VIRGIN AT 26!

9.

One Thursday evening while myself and Titi sat down on my not so wide porch, we wallowed in gossiping and drinking her dad's wine.

"So you finally agreed you like this guy, Tracy".

" Yeah, but-".

Titi clapped her hands immediately, a form of shutting me up, "No but at all, this is the third guy this year that you've told me you liked and yet you shut them off till they-".

"Disappear and I start regretting, yeah I know", I cut her off too. "It just not easy Titi, I've seen you especially go into a serious mental breakdown after Justin left you".

"Justin left cause we weren't able to work out so much differences between us, do not compare Justin with George. You have a beautiful soul and deserves one too".

"Okay how about the other one that got me drunk and after a failed attempt to fuck me he just shut me off and told me it was over through the phone,uh?", I laughed, "Or was it the other guy that came visiting and ended up collecting my landlord daughter's contact right inside my living room while I was there and the rest they say is history".

"Tracy"-

"There are more T and you know it and George ain't no different from them all. I still can't believe he was in my house and I allowed him to touch me".

"You enjoyed it didn't you?", Titi pinched me as she added.

"Maybe", I laughed so hard, "Seriously men in Lagos are something else, there are no serious ones anymore", I sighed heavily. " I just want someone who would love me, that's so simple right. I mean I will fucking love that man back so why is it so difficult to get a man to do just same uh".

"Do you love this George Tracy? Do not run from this question now cause I know you".

I laughed, "Have got this feeling inside of me, one I know no man has ever made me feel. His presence is everything, that Feeling of want you know. He said he wants me too, I just have this trust issues Titi. Like I don't want him hurting me, I can't bear giving myself to a man I love and I get hurt at the end", I got so overwhelmed that I didn't know how to stop talking. "That night I was on the brink of demanding real sex from George, see that's something I have never felt nor decided in my entire life".

"For real, you felt like that around him?", Titi asked me with so much alacrity. "Wait that means you ready to give up your virginity?".

"Just maybe I guess", I was so unsure.

"But with George? wow", she clapped her hands again. "I could invite him over."

"No, he mad at me I guess. He got angry when I told him to leave". That was when it dawned on me that it's been 20 days already.

"He will show up if he truly wants you, I guess", Titi shrugged.

"Yeah I guess so". I added in a drawl.

"Yeah Tracy and when He shows up do not shut your walls against him and I mean your heart", Titi laughed, "no go Dey think another kind of wall o".

We both laughed.

"What if he doesn't show up?", the question I had been trying so hard to dodge.

Titi shrugged, "Another will".