(22)Do It Like A Dude

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Ch.22

Do It Like A Dude

 

Dear Drew,

 

I am very sad to inform you that your hair gel got filled with water so I threw it. Your hair dryer got stacked by electricity so it burned. Your favorite Mickey Mouse boxers got blew out by the wind and are in your neighbor’s yard, they probably threw all of them. Poor condoms, they got crushed by big foot who was walking in your house the other day.

 

Your posters that you have been keeping from your annoying little sister and parents are in shreds, you’re a pervert. Your pink bunny slippers that I put in the washing machine turned blew so I dyed it but unfortunately it turned brown and orange.

 

The Merlin stick that you have been saving for since your birth broke, you’re an idiot anyways so you probably know that you could have bought something better that the Merlin wizard stick.

 

 Your bras were thrown due to environmental diseases cause by humans (A lot of sex, being naughty in the bathroom, etc…)

 

As you heard in the news a lot of people have been getting bellies for sleeping then eating and repeating that all day long, so I advise you to eat broccoli every day. 

  Unfortunately doctors are expecting you to calm you sex life a little bit so that you bladder doesn’t reproduce much pee.

                                                                                                                                        

                                                                                                          Sincerely,

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  Santa Claus.

 

P.S. We are having secretly filming a lot of teens with the same problem so don’t panic and I’m very sad from you, you didn’t put cookies for me.

I folded the letter and put it on Drew’s bed tears in my eyes. I looked at Ryder and Tom who looked like they’re going to pass out from laughing.

Raidon hasn’t made any contact with me because of what the incident and to tell you I sort of regret it seeing that my secret could blow out in a second but on second thought he really deserved it…

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