A Walk On Ice

27: Solace

Melissa

I flopped myself up on my elbow beside Carroll, my body facing her. She was fumbling with the stuffed toy, refusing to make eye contact with me. I think she's going to open up to me now, let me into her own universe that the whole world didn't know about. The universe where all of her secrets are being kept locked.

I waited patiently for her to speak. When I was doing that, I was running my hand through her long brown hair and massaging her scalp, trying to comfort her in some way. Hopefully it will work. It didn't take long for her to start speaking.

"Three years ago, my family was still intact and happy.. We are, what everyone would define as a perfect family. Dad and mom were working together in the company while training Sam.. Meanwhile, Carl and I are studying and bonding with each other.. We were all happy way back then.." Carroll's emerald eyes seem to be somewhere else not here, like they were looking at the memory of her once perfect family. She had a smile on her face until she continued explaining.

"But everything went upside down when I caught my mother having an affair with her best friend right under our roof." Carroll's jaws and fists were visibly clenched, and her eyes turned darker at the memory, or should I say nightmare. I didn't speak. Instead, I sat up and continued massaging her scalp. She looked up at me before she laid her head on my lap.

"Mom left us, and it felt like she took everything away from me the second she left this house and never returned again. From what I heard from dad, she married her best friend and they now live together. They now run the Devin Group together, like how she and dad used to run our own company in the past... It broke me more seeing that she's actually happy with that woman that she didn't return to our house.." She sighed before resuming to her story. "When she left, it felt like the world fell and that I had to build my walls up high and never trust anyone again.. Happiness, I wasn't able to find it.. And my only goal was to lead and be supreme, but my life? I forgot where it's supposed to go.. I shut everyone out and every time my mom reaches out for me, I ignore her.. I never visited her.."

"But that doesn't mean that I don't think of her or I don't miss her because for a fact I do think of her and I miss her every single day." Carroll's voice broke as a sob escaped her throat. I pulled her up to sit and pulled her in my embrace. She laid her head on my chest while her arms snaked around my waist. As for me, I kept massaging her scalp around the back of her head while my other hand was on her back, rubbing soothing circles. "I miss her so fucking much, Melissa, that it hurts!" She cried out. "I know that she feels the same too.. Let it all out, I'm here...." Carroll did and her shoulders shook stronger this time.

I felt her hands clenching my shirt. "Carroll, do you know where she lives?" She nodded against my chest. I carefully asked the next question because I am not certain of what her answer would be. "Do..you want to go visit her tomorrow?" I didn't get any answer. All I could hear were Carroll's whimpers and my breathing.

Carroll pulled herself from my arms then she wiped her eyes using the back of her hand. "Yes," was her answer to my question. I felt myself relieved. "I realized some things and I need to talk to her as soon as possible.." She explained, still sniffling. "And what are those things? If you only want to tell me.." Carroll looked at me, seems to be contemplating. "I think that it's not only my mom's fault that this family has come to its doom.. I think my dad is the main root of everything.. And I want you to come with me to a place that really is special to my heart.."

"I will go wherever you want to take me, Carroll." I smiled before we hugged again. We stayed like that for a while, her harsh that soon turned to soft breathing and my own breathing were all I could hear in the room,  before we fell asleep. I was leaning on the headboard while Carroll was resting on top of me, my arms wrapped around her waist and her hands on top of mine.