Don't Give Up On Me ✔

Chapter 56 ~ Don't be. I'm not

"Hey Love," he says with his charming smile, but he must have noticed that something was off with me because his face quickly morphs into one of concern. "What's wrong?" I don't understand how I can want to be so far away from him because I'm scared to tell him something, and yet yearn to be next to him. Why does he make me feel this way? I have to tell him something that at least to me is a really big deal and it scares me, but at the same time I feel safe and I trust him.

"Can we talk, Hayden?"

"Sure, come in." He says, opening his bedroom door wider.

Isla's POV

"Thanks." I whisper, as I enter Hayden's room and shut his door.

I stand next to his door not really knowing what to do. Hayden stares at me in confusion. "Umm," he rakes his hand through his hair, unsure of himself. "Did I do something wrong, Love? Because if I did, I honestly don't know what it was, but I'm sorry."

He is making this so much harder on me than he even realizes. Hayden could never do anything wrong. It was me who did him wrong. "No, you didn't do anything wrong. You never do anything wrong."

He sighs in relief. "Okay Love. Umm, you do know that you don't have to stay standing next to the door. You can have a seat." He says patting the spot on his bed next to him. "It will probably be easier talking without you being all the way across the room."

Unwillingly, I force myself to walk across his room and sit by him on his bed. Why is this so much harder than it was telling Luke and Tyler? Sitting beside him, I twiddle my thumbs, not being able to force myself to make eye contact with him yet. Hayden cares so much for me, and I never wanted to hurt him. I'm so worried how he's going to take that I kissed Killian. Of course, Hayden being the amazing person he is, grabs my hand and intertwined our fingers. "Love, what's wrong? Did someone hurt you?"

The tears are already freely flowing from my eyes. "I'm so sorry Hayden. I don't know what came over me at the moment. I never meant for it to happen."

There is concern in his eyes, but I doubt it will stay that way for long. "Isla, what's wrong? What happened?" He says pulling me closer to him. "Whatever happened I'm sure it isn't as bad as you think it is. We can figure out a solution to the problem, I promise."

I pull my hand away from his, because at the moment, his touch burns me. I don't deserve to have such an amazing person in my life when all I'm going to do is hurt him. "I want to explain from the beginning, not that it makes any of this right. Sofia said her, Killian, and Nick were going to the mall and she wanted me to come. So of course, I agreed. Nick and Killian are great, but they aren't fun to shop with at the mall. On the way to the mall we found a carnival, and with Nick and Sofia's inner child, they wanted to go to the carnival instead. When we got there Sofia and Nick took off leaving me and Killian alone. We decided to ride some rides and get something to eat. Things were going great."

"Until..." Hayden says worriedly.

I swallow hard. "Until Killian and I decided to take pictures in a picture booth. We were just playing around doing different types of poses. In one photo I kissed his cheek and then in the next he kissed my cheek. I was going to kiss his cheek again." I gulp. "But I guess he had the same idea and our lips met. The next thing I know he was kissing me, and I was kissing him back." I cry. "I'm so sorry Hayden."

I wait for Hayden to say something, but he remains silent. His silence scares me. He's never been one to not have something to say that makes me feel better, but I'm afraid this time I might have hurt him. "Hayden, please believe me. I never meant for this to happen. I'm still trying to figure things out and the last thing I would ever want to do is to hurt you. You mean too much to me."