" can we went back to how we used to? " _____________________________
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21
chaeyoung's
crying . can that be called as an everyday routine? remembering every second we had together and how i ruin all of it. can that be called as an everyday routine too?
reminiscing about how, you left me a very dissapointing expression yet you gave me your sweetest goodbye, by giving me your smile that i won't be able to see anymore.
everytime, i regret my choices of decision on that day. i let you go willingly and you accepted it like we were never meant to be but why am i sad when im the one who let you go?
you went back before throwing away a bouquet of flowers and i saw. i realise that those flowers were one of the flower you gave me when we went out on our special date together. you remember. that flower were always precious out of all my memories and you threw it away . why? the answer is all in me.
it's been a month since you left and it's been a month too, I've lived in sorrows. parting ways with you was unfortunately the saddest and the most painful feelings that i've felt. it's like half of my heart has been teared from me as a punishment for what i have done.
i'm sorry, my love. my hot cunning devil.
i never hated being called your angel because no matter how much i said that I hated it, i always love it. it represents how i belongs to you and how you belongs to me. the night we dance under the moonlight, saying "i love you" towards each other, has always been the happiest moment of my life. on that day too, i felt love especially when you were beside me.
you are my sources of light when im through my darkest day. now that you're gone, i have no reason to have a bright light in my life. i miss you truthfully.
how have you been during all those days after saying your goodbye? have you move on? not like im suppose to be sad when i let you go but i should be ashame because i am living in sadness and emptiness.
i hope you're happy without me and i wish you find someone that loves you more than me. loves you till the end unlike me and you did. I've seen the news about you. you look happier and she does too. i hope she's the one for you. she looks so beautiful way more beautiful than me and maybe she's your new angel now.
i hope she takes care of you better than me. i hope she didn't let you go willingly like how I did. i hope she appreciates you unlike me. i hope she gives you all the love that you hasn't been receiving from me.
and lastly , i hope i stop loving and wanting you. everyday, i questions all of that but one question is always in my head.
"can we went back to how we used to? "
when there's no challenges between our love. when there's no misunderstood between us. when there's only the presence of love between us two. when there's still an 'us' and a 'we'. when we're still madly in love with each other.
but all of that seems to be in vain went i found out about you and her. seems like we will never be together anymore.
"i hope you're happy, jeongguk and i will always be your angel though you've replace me. " tears flowing down my cheeks like an endless waterfall . my eyes clearly red with an untouched food placed beside me. jimin has been urging be to eat but i didn't.
everyday, i eat lesser and the last time i ever stood on the cafe was went we parted. jimin has been taking over the cafe for a month. how can I went to work like nothing had happened and when our goodbyes happens there. the memories were still vivid in my head.
"i love you, jeongguk. " i whispers, my voice cracking after lots of crying. like i said it has been a part of my daily routine. staring lifelessly at the window, the sounds of the rain soothing me out in the silence atmosphere.
it would be nicer if jeongguk is here with me, his arms around my waist ,feeling his warmth that always feels like home to me. i guess he's doing that with her now.
hope your happy too now that im not part of your burden.
[ to be continued ]
• H I S A N G E L •
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<SONG ON QUE> any songs that suits this chapter.
~•~•~•~•~•~• not edited ~•~•~•~•~•~•
so, i hope all of you love this chapter because i really thought that my writing is appearing to be more worst. im sorry if you can't really understand some sentences since english is not my first languageand shadow trailer makes my head explode with all sorts of theories.
i love all of you readers! leave out some comments and vote! ♡
lastly, thanks for 5k and #4 in rosekook , you guys are just so sweet! thank you for all the support!!
