4 Run to the Hills: Part 1

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November 13th - November 14th, 2013

I pulled into a long gravel driveway that led up into the trees. The driveway weaved around large spruce trees for quite a ways until it finally came to a small clearing. Two cars were parked in a little area. A rusted El Camino was parked crooked against the mountainside.

Next to the Pinto was a Frankenstein-Esque Ford Bronco. It looked like the original body was a dark blue, but the driver's side door had since been replaced with a sun-beaten red door, and the hood was now a dull white.

I pulled up next to the Bronco and parked. Just a few feet away from where the cars were all parked was a set of stairs carved into the mountain stone. The stairs led up the mountain about twenty or thirty feet before they reached a landing. I could see from down where the cars were that up by the landing was a small shack that looked so old the mountain could have grown around it. A few windows were boarded up, and tree limbs crouched over the roof of the shack, nearly blocking the door to go inside.

I took my phone out and tried to call Garth, but I quickly realized that I didn't have any service this far into the mountains. I got out of the car and swung my bag over my shoulder. I was excited to see Garth. I was excited to just be somewhere that I felt comfortable being for the first time in quite a while.

I struggled to make the trek up the staircase as my body was just exhausted. It felt like each pant leg was lined with lead, and each step up the stairs was more difficult than the last. Finally, I reached the top and started making my way to the front door, being sure to duck under the large tree limb that hung down from the tree above.

I walked up to the door and read the sign on it. Please Ring Doorbell! With an arrow pointing next to the door. Above the door, a taxidermized elk head was mounted. I went ahead and rang the doorbell and could hear the sudden sound of House of Pain's Jump Around started blaring from inside the cabin, and a noise started coming from the elk head. I looked up just in time to get splashed in the face with something from the elk's mouth.

I groaned. "Really, dude?" I started wiping my face off with the sleeve of my jacket.

Then a small slot opened on the door, just a crack. I looked down, and suddenly a few squirts of water hit me again, this time from the gap in the door.

"Hey." I put my arm up to block the water. "You already got me."

"Maybe. Can never be too sure," Garth said, "Give me a second to unlock the door."

I stood and waited for Garth to undo the eight or nine locks that were on the door. Everything from deadbolts to chain locks to a sliding bar lock.

Then the door swung open. Garth was standing there in a fluffy, blue bathrobe. There was some type of sickly-green paste that covered his face, except for his eyes. He had pink bunny slippers on and a towel wrapped around his head.

"Maddison!" Garth stepped towards me with his arms out. "It's so good to see you!"

"Hi, Garth." I chuckled and gave him a hug. "It's good to see you too." I stepped back from our hug and furrowed my brow. "Um, what... is on your face, by the way?"

"Oh, this?" He gestured to his face. "This is just a green tea matcha mud mask. It has great antioxidants. Also really helps nourish and moisturize the skin. Plus, my special lady likes my soft cheeks."

I raised my eyebrows and nodded. "Oh, I'm sure she does."

Garth looked down for a second. "Yeah. Well, you actually got here at the perfect time. I just finished my bath and was getting ready to make smoothies for the house tour. Come on in." He turned and started walking further into the cabin.

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