Just around the corner

Chapter 3

One year after Alex's death

Ever since Misty went to her first house party, she has been going nearly every single week. She has a great group of friends. They watch out for her and make sure she is home by her curfew. The past 6 months have gone so quickly

Only a month ago she came home from one of these parties and started telling me all about a guy she met. He knocked her socks off, as she would say. She bought Tyson to the house a couple of weeks ago. Lovely young man. Very polite and very respectful. Their relationship reminds me so much of mine and Alex's in the beginning. I just keep reiterating to Misty to use protection when she starts having sex.

"Mum" Lacy screams for me. "Yes baby" I say back to her as I walk into her room. Lacy still has not come to terms with her fathers passing. "Mum, nothing fits. I have no clothes to wear to school. My bras don't fit anymore either" I watch the tears fall from her eyes. My baby has gone through a growth spurt. I never noticed as she is always locked away in her room.

"Lacy, it's ok. We will go into Misty's room and you can borrow something of hers. We will go shopping after school today" I say to her as I wrap my arms around her. "Lacy, baby. You need to stop locking yourself away from the world. If I knew what was going on, we could have gone shopping already"

Her tears are still falling and I know this is not because of her clothes not fitting her. "Lace tell me what is going on in that head of yours?" she sniffles before she pulls back "I just miss dad. I miss him so bad mum. It is not fair that he had to leave us" Lacy cries out to me. I pull her back into my arms in a tighter embrace. "I know baby, I know" I whisper into her hair. "I wish I could say it will get better but I don't think it ever will. But I do know that your dad would not want you to give up. He would be telling you that it is ok to miss him but you need to keep going" I say to her. I know that what I am saying is more for me but she also needed to hear it.

I take her into Misty's room and explain to Misty what was going on. She was straight into big sister mode and helped Lacy pick out an outfit that hopefully made her feel better about herself. I left the girls to do that. They needed bonding time. With everything going in both of their lives, they have forgotten about each other.

Walking into the kitchen to make breakfast I can hear the girls giggling from the bedrooms. The sound alone has brought tears to my eyes. I start the kettle to make a coffee to go, looking at the time I can see that I will be late if I do not get a move on. The girls come down still laughing, arm in arm. "Girls you will have to organize your own breakfasts. I did not realize the time and I will be late if I do not get a move on. I have left money on the hall table for your lunches. Have a great day and I will see you both tonight. I love you" I say to the girls giving them both a kiss on their cheeks.

I grab my coffee and my bag and keys and walked out the front door.

The drive to work is testing my patience today. I am not normally an impatient person but fuck me. Every red light, every train level crossing, every man, and his fucking dog. "Fuck, fuck, fuck" I scream while punching the steering wheel. I am already late for work. I call my boss and let her know that I will be late as traffic is a bitch.

Finally I get a good run through the city and I am about five minutes away from work when suddenly I hear a massive crunch of metal. I feel my car start giving out on me and start to spin. "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" I scream. The car does a full 3 turns before it comes to rest of the median strip between traffic. My heart is racing, my breathing coming out in short pants. Dark spots dancing across my vision. I feel a heat over my thighs, I look down and notice my coffee cup has spilt over my legs. They are burning.

"Holy shit that hurts. Oh fuck if that hurts, it means I can still feel my legs. Oh thank Christ I can still feel my legs" I ramble to myself. There is a knock on my window. I move my eyes to look out. "Miss, are you alright? Help is on its way" The lovely lady says beside me.

I give her a thumbs up and a small smile. Remembering not to move my head, just in case. The radio is still playing through the car and I start humming along with the tune. Trying to take my mind off of what has just happened.

I can hear the sirens approaching and relief runs through my body. The car door is opened and my god if I were not just in a crash, I would be jumping this guys bones. "Hey there, how you doing? My name is Jason. What is yours?" He asks. "Laura. My name is Laura" "Well howdy there Laura. You look like you are in a bit of a pickle. The paramedics will be here to help you out. I can see that nothing is obstructing you, so I would say you will be out within minutes. Just hold tight" He says with a smile.

"I'm so sorry Alex. I am so bloody sorry" I say off into the air quietly. He has only been gone for a year and I should not be feeling this way. I know I should not be feeling this way. "Why are you punishing me universe? What have I done so wrong?" I curse the world for my misfortunes. I lose my husband. I have an accident and the first emergency respondent has to look like a goddamn Greek god. Shoot me now.

Jason was not wrong when he said I would be out of the car within minutes. I was placed on a stretcher with a neck brace for safety reasons. Questions were being thrown at me left and right and I was answering them to the best of my ability. I could feel everything they did to me so at least I was not hurt badly. Maybe a bit of whiplash the paramedic says.

The trip to the hospital was quick. Going through the emergency department was quick. All tests and scans were rushed. Which I was thankful for. Once the neck brace was removed and I was able to sit up, everything finally came crashing down on me. The tears were endless.

The pain in my heart is crippling. It is like a switch was flicked and the pain and sorrow has hit again with vengeance. Alex has only been gone for a year. He was my world. He was my reason for breathing. He was the man I was meant to grow old with, to sit on our front porch cussing out the teenagers of the world. Telling our grandkids stories from back in our days.

Now here I am, sitting on a hospital bed, in an emergency department, after being involved in a car accident. Thinking of my dead husband and the Greek god who spoke to me in the car.

It must have been hours before they released me. I started looking for my handbag to call for a ride home when it came to me that I did not have my bag with me. I call for a nurse and ask if it was handed in when I came in and she responded with a flat-out no. No need to be a bitch about it love. Jesus!

I get dressed back into my work clothes and head out the front of the emergency department. I sit down on the bench, looking out to the world. Tears are still running down my cheeks. I thought I was getting better at this moving on bullshit they call life.

"Miss, excuse me Miss" I am still in my own little world, inside my head I do not hear the person calling me. It is not until the person touches my shoulder that I am brought back to the real world. I look up to the person touching me and curse the universe "Why God are you punishing me?" I say out loud. "Didn't realise I was a punishment, but I can be if you would like?" He chuckles. "After you were taken by the paramedics, I went back to your car and noticed your bag was in there. I thought you may have needed it" He says with a smile. Already flustered by my recent outburst, I take my handbag back from the Greek God. "Thank you" I say on a whisper.

Jason sits down next to me. "I'm so sorry, I have forgotten your name" He chuckles, "please don't hold that against me though, but it seems to me you could do with a shoulder to cry on today" I look into this mans eyes. His eyes are a deep chocolate brown, you would think they were black if you were not up close.

"I'm sorry. Just life has gotten me down today. I was involved in a car crash" "Yeah, I know. I was there" He cuts in. "I never got to work. I never got to ring my boss. I will probably be fired now. I do not have a car to get to and from places now. My girls will be worrying about me because I am not home. I just have a lot of shit on my plate and I feel like I'm drowning" I take a deep breath. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't be venting all this to you" I say to him quietly

Jason puts his arm around my shoulders and pulls me into his side. "Never apologise for the way you feel. Life is a bitch. As I said it looked like you needed a shoulder and I offered mine, so please use my shoulder as much as you would like" Jason tells me with a smile on his face. I look into his eyes and take him up on his offer. I rest my head on his shoulder and watch the world go by.