Just around the corner

Chapter 14

Misty has been very quiet tonight. I have tried to talk to her but she has shut down. I know that my current mood hasn't been the best to live with, but I am trying. I am trying to fix everything that has happened in the past 2 months. I understand why Misty is mad at me. I am choosing her and her sister over me and my happiness, but as a parent all you want to see is your children healthy and happy.

Lacy, what can I say about her. Chelsea spoke to me at work today about Lacy. She told me that Lace is doing good with her. She is able to speak to her freely and Lacy's biggest concern with me is that I am trying to forget about her father. We all know that isn't true but Lacy has it embedded in her brain that I am.

I have sent multiple messages to Lacy, trying to get her to talk to me but every single one of them has sat on read. I know we need this space, but I do miss my baby girl. I lay in bed most nights awake, my mind is racing with thoughts on how I got here. I know in my heart that Alex would be so disappointed in me. In the way I have been behaving. I just wish he was here now to fix the gaping hole that is swallowing up our family.

**

Driving into work the next morning, my brain is still not registering anything that is going on. It is like I blinked and I had arrived. Another day, another dollar they say but to me it's another day of heart ache and tears.

Sitting at my desk, I turn my computer on and wait for it to load. Normally I would be at the 'water cooler' getting all the 'goss' from the gossips here. But these days, I just can't bring myself to it. I don't care that Larry from finance is sleeping with Chloe from sales. It is like this is some big secret. It isn't.

Staring blankly ahead, the computer screen is not making much sense to me. All the colours are blurring into one. I am bought out of my trance by somebody knocking on my desk to get my attention. Looking up I meet a bunch of flowers. They are absolutely beautiful. Tulips, one of my favourite flowers. They will never compare to the sunflowers that Alex would always get me and we would grow in our garden, but tulips are absolutely stunning.

The deliverer places them down on my desk and I take a sniff of them. I sign the PDA and they leave quickly. I stare at the bunch of flowers. The vibrant yellows and purples with the pinks and reds. My heart is racing as I see the card attached. All that is going through my head is who the hell ordered these flowers?

I open the card and tears start to build up in my eyes.

Laura, I hope you don't mind that I have sent these to you at work. I miss you. I miss you so much that I cannot move on from you. I would like for you to give us a go. Please? Misty came to see me at work and told me everything that had happened since that night of our date. She also told me to not give up on you. She is worried about you and everything you do.

Please call me or even send me a message. I'm very close to begging on my knees and if I have to, I will. I hope to hear from you soon

Jason xx

I can't help the tears from falling. All the girls who work near my cubicle all watch on with curious eyes. Chelsea makes her way over and smells the flowers and then grabs the card from my hands. Her eyes light up when she notices they are from Jason. "It is a sign Laura. It is a sign" She says to me. I am too choked up to respond to her. I put my head in my hands and just let it all out.

I miss him. He made me smile. He made me laugh. He made me feel alive and I threw it all away for Lacy. I threw it all away to make her happy, but that still didn't work.

**

Misty POV

I think I may have over stepped the line with Mum's personal life. Going to find Jason was something that I shouldn't have done, but it was also something that I had to do. I cannot handle watching mum put herself through any more heart ache. She needs something to look forward to. She needs someone to hold her and tell her everything will be ok. She needs someone who can love her in ways that Lacy and I can't.

I ran into Lacy in the school yard yesterday. She looked like shit. Bags under her eyes that her makeup wasn't covering. She looked like she had lost weight. I hope she is feeling the affects of her behaviour. Mum has only ever put us first. Even when dad was around, she always and I mean always put him and us before herself.

I'm sitting in English, my mind is not paying any attention to what Mr. Harris is talking about. I find him a boring teacher. He has no sense of humour. I stare out the window, watching the world go by. I spot Lacy walking out of the school with her bag on her back. "Mr. Harris, can I go to the bathroom?" I shout out in the classroom. Mr. Harris grunts at me and nods his head. I grab all my things and walk out the door.

Once I am in the hallway, I make a run for the front doors of the school. Chasing after Lacy in my flip flops is probably not the smartest idea but shit happens.

"LACY" I scream out her name. She must not have heard me, unless she is ignoring me. I keep running after her. "LACY" I scream again. This time she stops and I see her shoulders sag. Clearly she was ignoring me the first time. When I am close enough to her, I grab her elbow and spin her to face me. Her eyes are glassy and bloodshot.

"Lacy, what the fuck is going on?" I ask her. "Nothing. Leave me alone, Mis" She spits back at me. "No, not until you tell me what the hell is going on? Why won't you talk to mum? Why are you leaving school? Why are you crying?" I spit the questions at her in quick succession. The tears are falling from her eyes.

"Misty, I'm scared. I'm scared of everything that is going to happen if mum continues to see this guy. I'm scared of being left behind. I'm scared she is going to forget about all the memories that we made with Dad. I'm just scared" Lacy says while her tears are still falling from her face.

I pull her into a cuddle. She needs one. "Lace, mum isn't going to forget anything or anyone. She is moving forward with her life. She has been through enough heart ache to last a lifetime. She is now open to healing her heart. She will not forget dad and she will never forget you. You won't be left behind" I say to her. I keep Lacy in my arms as she silently breaks down on my shoulder.

Her shaking shoulders are starting to calm down as are her sniffles. "Lace?" I call her name. She slowly lifts her head off of my shoulder and looks at me with her sad eyes. "Lace, Jason is a nice guy. I have met him a couple of times. Mum has only been out with him the once but I went and found him yesterday at his work. I am trying to get them to work their shit out, but mum really needs you and your blessing. You will like Jason. He is nothing like Dad and he doesn't want to replace him in our lives. He just wants to be there for us"

I can see Lacy trying to work this shit out in her head. I am just hoping that I have done enough to bring not only my family back together, but to help Mum and Jason find their footing. "Misty?" Lacy calls my name. "Hmmm yeah Lace?" "Can you take me home? I really want to be in my own room and wait for mum to get home from work"

I kiss Lacy on her head and place her hand in my inner elbow. "Let's go little sister. Mum will be over the moon when she gets home and see's you there"

We walk back to school arm in arm. I take her to my locker and grab my bag. We walk back out to my car, jumping in as soon as it was unlocked. Lacy plugged her phone into the AUX cord. We had to listen to some shitty pop band she likes but I will deal with it. Pulling up in the driveway, it was a weird feeling. I don't know if it was coming from me or from Lacy.

We both jump out of the car and walk up to the front door. "Will mum be mad that I came home?" Lacy asks with what sounds like worry in her voice. I turn my head to look at her "She'll be thankful you are here Lace. She has tried to do everything right by you for the past 2 months. It is time for you to let go of all the anger and the hurt. Mum will always be there for us, but we, as her daughters, need to support her in whatever she chooses to do"