Chapter 16

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Me and Hardin spent the last few days at home on the couch together watching movies. Both of us needed time to grieve together and come to terms with everything. Today is a new day and I've decided to focus on work. I get up early and leave a note for hardin telling him I'm at the studio and I will be back later. Im still really tired from not getting any sleep. My time is spent watching hardin sleep at night. Every time I fall asleep all I dream about is a future that hardin and I could have and then I end up destroying everything. Its the one thing I dread every day because eventhough I force myself not to sleep im so tired I drift in and out and then wake up so quickly i scare myself and wake up hardin as well.

I get to the studio and take out my laptop seeing what meetings and appointments I have coming up. I still have 3 of my brides weddings coming up 2 of which are completely organised its just a matter of waiting until the bid day comes up. My new bride Ashley who I talked to a few weeks ago is freaking out over everything feeling really stressed out but I have no idea why because im organising and planning everything all she has to do is pick colours and styles for the venue weve already booked. I decide to catch up on emails because im already ahead in planning all the weddings I just have to wait till appointments with the caterer and bride etc. 95 new emails really. I slowly work my way through the emails opening and scanning over them before either replying or deleting them. I come across an email marked as 'Urgent'.To summarise the email is asking me if I can fly over to New York for a month to plan a lady who is really big in the fashion industry. Her assistant Jackie said that shes seen my work and would love if I could plan her wedding. The email also said that I would have to fly out sometime within the next 2 weeks and my flight and hotel would all be payed for. I dont know how I could say not to an opportunity like this planning a wedding for a BIG name would be amazing for me. My name is already out there in the wedding planning industry but I have yet to plan anything for someone who has a big name.However a month is a long time. A long time away from hardin and it would be our first time apart since he's been back. I dont know how I feel about leaving for so long. Theres still the thought of him leaving without a word in the back of my head and I would do anything to prevent that from happening. I decide that im going to talk to hardin about this before I reply. He could always come with me but I know him and he wouldn't want to be cooped up inside a hotel all day for a month and I would be out almost every day.

I spend the rest of my day organising files and templates of materials and colours. Its already dark outside and I havent eaten all day. I needed the distraction and work does just that. I get in the car ready to head back home and stop at the shop for grocerys quickly. Its quiet at this time of night and I find it peaceful going outside at night time eventhough its probably the most dangerous time of day to go for a walk outside.

"Hey you OK?" I walk into the apartment hardin greeting me.

"Ye im fine why?" He grabs the grocery off me and puts them on the counter.

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