Chapter XXXIII

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~Tuesday 9th January 2018~

Dakota hadn't slept well, which was obvious to the naked eye, but so much worse to him. Of course, he hadn't slept at all really, just drifted into that same pathetic state that his ring would always put him into was nothing special, in fact, he wasn't even sure it was worth it. He thought about just giving up, spending his nights reading or drawing or something that could at least occupy his mind, rather than allowing it to just sit there, unused, unentertained, for so many hours.

He was getting pretty good at dissociating during the nights; creating images of Vasile and scenarios where they were together. Not so far apart, not so hidden from one another. They almost seemed real, and they could occupy him for hours, but it wasn't the same as being with him truly. And it was nothing like a dream. In dreams, one could feel. Emotions could change, realities shift, it could seem more than just an illusion. Dakota's scenarios were nothing like that.

That wasn't the worst aspect of those dreams either. No, that had to be the after-effects. If Dakota had thought not being able to sleep was frustrating, then he had grossly underestimated the irritation he would endure when he woke with morning wood. Getting off himself was never all that fun, but at least it offered quick and easy release. Now that he was bonded Vasile, he didn't even have the option anymore. He had to go two weeks with no relief. Granted, yes, there wasn't really much stimulation either, since he was only with family and Vasile was so far away. However, that meant the nights just became a thousand times worse. Or rather, the mornings did.

That was precisely the issue that Dakota 'woke' with that morning. He had stayed in the guest room at Tamerynn and Klave's cabin, and came around in a flush of heat, despite the cold air biting into his bare arm that was resting over the tangled covers around him. He let out a soft whine, shifting his hips ever so slightly, grimacing when the rough fabric of the covers brushed against the sensitive skin on his erection. It was horrific.

Dakota reached under the covers, stroking himself lazily with gentle moans, although he knew he was only going to make everything worse. He couldn't finish. No matter whether he imagined Vasile right in front of him, right there with him, guiding him through, he could only get close. He couldn't push himself over the edge. Only Vasile could do that. And he was too far away to even try.

Still, that didn't stop Dakota. Instead, he allowed his eyes to flutter closed, and his mind to wander. He could almost see it clearly, Vasile knelt between his legs, just as flushed as Dakota, yet wearing that wry smirk of his. His hands ghosted over the boy's thighs, sending trails of sparks bursting beneath his touch, causing Dakota to bite down on his lip hard enough to draw blood. The metallic taste didn't last long though, before Vasile stole another kiss from him, lapping at the wound, his tongue slipping past the seam of the boy's lips.

Dakota could practically feel the silken skin of the man's biceps under his fingertips, the contrast of the rough brands and scars that covered his back. He could feel the muscles ripple as the man shivered, could see the adoration shining in his dark eyes, could even feel his breath whispering over the boy's skin. It was so real. So damn real that Dakota almost forgot it wasn't. Almost.

Dakota arched his back, keening to the illusions lips as they dragged over his skin, rough and raw, leaving soft kisses in some places and patches of deep purple in others. His torso was mottled with colour, flushed red with want, with need, and all that left his lips were a thousand promises, each followed by a please. A please that was so desperate, so heated, that Dakota couldn't even be sure it was his own voice.

Dakota let out a shaky breath as he watched Vasile's claws rake down over his thigh, pressing in deep for him to fear they might puncture his flesh, but not enough for blood to follow. He couldn't take his eyes off the illusion, his desperation and frustration battling out in his mind. Reality against mirage, wrong against right, guilt against lust. Nothing could win. Nothing managed to gain the upper hand, everything was just made a thousand times worse.

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