Head in The Clouds

Something Is Wrong

Vanessa age 55
Daniella and Camilo are getting married today. Camilo proposed to Daniella last year, a few days before thanksgiving. He planned a beautiful surprise. Camilo invited everyone over to their place. He made a feast for us all. He cooked all of Daniella's favorite foods. As Nina and I were talking about her law practice, Camilo stood up, mad a beautiful speech about how much he loved Daniella. We were all crying by the end.

A year later, I am zipping my baby into her wedding dress.
"You look absolutely beautiful Mija. I am so happy for you."
"Thanks Mama. I am so happy. I have been in love with Camilo for as long as I can remember. The only thing I hate, is I can't give him a baby. I worry he will resent me for that one day."
"Honey, that boy adores you. You guys will make things work. There is more than one way to have a baby. Mama and Mamí adopted me. You can also do surrogacy. Right now though, enjoy you time just the two of you. Children will come, if you want. You will never get the time of just the two of you back."
"I love you Mama."
"I love you too. Now, have you seen the brush? I need to fix your hair."
"Mama, it's in your hand."
I look down and my face flames in embarrassment. "Right. I would lose my own head if it wasn't attached."

Vanessa age 56
I am out for a walk. Suddenly, I get this strong feeling of panic come over me. I look around and realize I don't know where I am. I don't have my phone on me, because I lost it. Usnavi went to get me a new one. The biggest problem is, I don't remember when that was.
I start walking around, looking for any familiar sight. "Why can't I remember where I am," I ask myself. "What is wrong with me?" Soon, I am silently crying.
I continue to walk, when I hear someone call my name. I turn and see Mama.
"Mama!"
"Vanessa, honey, what's wrong?"
"I don't know. I don't know where I am. I don't have my phone on me, and Usnavi is..."
"Vanessa, baby, you are outside your apartment."
"What?"
"Look honey."
I look and I finally recognize the door to my building.
"What's wrong honey. You look like you have been crying."
"I... I guess I am just tired."
"Are you sure?"
I hug my mama, seeing the concern in her eyes. "Yes Mama. I am okay now. I am going to go up and take a nap."
"I will walk up with you. It is my turn to make dinner tonight. Also, Lucia and David are coming over tonight. I told her I would cook her favorite dinner. I need to see what we have left in the kitchen."
Mama walks me up stairs, to my bedroom, and tucks me in, just like when I came to live with them.
"Have a good nap honey."
"Thanks Mama. Mama, I love you."
She leans over and kisses my head. "I love you too honey."

Later that night, Lucia and her boyfriend David come over. After dinner, we are sitting around talking, when Lucia speaks up.
"Mama, Papa, Abuelita, I have something I want to tell you guys."
"What is it Mija?"
She hands us each a bag. "What is this?"
"Open it Mama."
I open it to a onesie.
"No me diga! Are you serious?" Mama screams excitedly.
"Yeah. I am pregnant!"
Lucia has a ear to ear grin on her face.  I jump up and hug my oldest daughter. "I can't wait. I am going to be an Abuela."
I kiss Lucia on the head and hug her tight. "I can't wait to tell your Abuela."
Lucia seems to stiffen at this.
"Mija, what's wrong?"
"Mama, did you say Abuela?"
"Yeah."
"Mama, Abuela died nine years ago."
"Right," I say, my memories coming back to me. "I guess in my excitement, I just wasn't thinking. She would be so excited for you Mija. I can't wait to meet my grand baby."
"Mama, are you okay?"
"Yes. I am fine. I promise."
"Hey, your Papa needs a hug. I am going to an Abuelo."
Lucia smiles, let's go of me, and hugs her dad. "I am so proud of you Mija. You are going to be an amazing Mommy."
"Thanks Papi."

That night, I am getting ready for bed, when Usnavi comes in the room.
"Vanessa, Amor, can we talk?"
"Yes my love. What's wrong?"
"Dani and I have been talking. She is worried about you. She told me about what happened earlier."
"Oh, that was nothing. I was just tired."
"Vanessa, that's not the first thing like that to happen. I found you last week, confused on how to start the washer. I watched as you stared at it for several minutes. Vanessa, I am starting to worry about you. I found your phone in the freezer today. I found your keys in the still hanging in the door yesterday. It's small things that are happening a lot."
"Usnavi, look at me. I am fine."
"Did you know you didn't pay the power and water bill last month. Had I not paid when I did, they would have cut off our services."
"I though I paid those."
"You didn't. I just happed to walk by the computer, and it was still pulled up."
"I'm sorry Usnavi. I have been so scattered brained lately. There is nothing to worry about though."
"Can I at least take you to the doctor? I want someone to check you out. I want to make sure it is nothing serious."
"That's not necessary."
"Please, Amor, let me get you checked out."
"If it will make you feel better, fine, but there is nothing to worry about."
"Thank you. I love you Amor."
"I love you too Usnavi."
"Come on," he says motioning to me. "Let's celebrate becoming grandparents."
I grin, take his hand, and walk into his embrace.