Violet Shadows (FF7)

3) Demons

I sit far away from the group, alone under an oak tree nearby. I like it this way, by the shore where I can hear the water but don't have to touch it, a phobia caused by Hojo I'll have to explain in my later time. I'm alone, the air is cool, and no one dares to bother me, not after I threatened Barret when he wouldn't leave me alone. Let's say I threatened to shoot an arrow into some very... Personal areas. That's right men. Fear me.

Well, I was enjoying my peace until someone decides to invade my alone time. That, and I guess he's feeling a little lonely, maybe hoping for something that feels close enough to my sister. I can hardly even think her name without a bitter disgust, much less speak it. She told Hojo how much I could withstand, my boundaries, what he could do to me... I hate her. How Vincent could possibly still love her hurts my brain. Okay, so maybe he doesn't know about her secret loathing for me, nor the pain she let Hojo put me through, but why? I never understood men.

"You needed to get away too?" I ask after he stands there stupidly for a minute or two, making it clear that if a conversation was to be ignited, I would have to feed the spark myself.

"... Not exactly," he slowly eases to the ground a foot or two away from me, one knee raised with an arm draped over it. I bang my head backwards into the trunk a few times before Vincent finally glares at me, silently ordering me to stop.

"What do you want then?"

"Nothing." I roll my eyes before leaning forward to pick at my boots. "You've changed."

"Did you expect me to be the same after what Hojo put me through for three years?" I snap at him. He frowns and looks away from me, back toward the camp. "Directed under my stupid sister too," I mutter.

"She wasn't stupid," he comes her defense instantly.

"It was a replacement for a word Cid probably would be used," I sigh. "You're right, she was too smart for her own good." He scowls at me and I give him a cold look back. "Why do you hate me so much?" I finally scoff. He seems take aback a little bit for a moment before replying.

"I don't."

"Then why are you glaring at me like that? If you're just gonna bug me, go somewhere else," I snap bitterly. He sighs and shakes his head.

"You're alone."

"And?" I frown at him. "What does it matter to you? Lucretia didn't tell you to babysit me, did she?" And finally, he leaves. I don't understand myself. I find myself constantly wanting him there, just so that I can know reality, but when he's there, I just want him to go away. He knows too much, he can sense Shadow. I don't want him to know of the horrible creature inside...

~|~|~|~|~

"Let's start heading out!" Cloud calls. Vincent makes eye contact with me for a mere moment before helping tear down the camp. The still unused tent is unofficially mine (or Vincent's), but neither of us bother to use it. After thirty years of limited socializing, I don't trust many people, even if they are my traveling companions and old acquaintances.

"Are we all gonna fit on the plane?" Aeris frowns, looking over at Cid. The pilot shrugs.

"How am I to know? If we don't, we gotta leave stuff behind. No biggie."

"Right," she nods. Which definitely meant we had to get more gil to buy new tents and possibly sleeping bags. I hope they don't bother with me, because I won't sleep... I'll endure it as long as I can. That's the way it's always been. I stay awake for as many days as possible, and I finally can't help it anymore. One night of sleep full of terrors that come back from my hidden secrets and worst memories. And then the cycle repeats.