Chapter seventy five - The Snap

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When you woke up, something was very wrong. And Loki was gone.

"Loki?" you said sleepily as you woke, before jerking awake abruptly when you saw that he was missing.

I'm here. Something's wrong.

Where? What?

You were half asleep, scrambling to your feet and blinking hard to clear your blurred vision. After a few seconds of near blindness, you spotted Loki walking quickly back over towards the group, and relaxed for a second.

I'm here. I just went to the ship to see if there were any medical supplies when I started to feel-

Feel what?

I don't know.

You could feel it too, like something inside of you was missing. Some sort of integral part of you had disappeared. Fear rose in your throat again.

You were halfway towards Tony and the others before it started. Everything happened so fast from that point onwards.

"Something's happening." Mantis said nervously.

And then she disintegrated. You stopped dead in your tracks, staring, wondering if you were still asleep.

She just fell away into nothingness, leaving behind only ashes.

Are you seeing this?

Y/N.

He was scared. Something happened suddenly in your chest; someone had replaced all of your internal organs with ice. You tripped forward, watching as Drax disintegrated too, hardly able to believe what you were seeing. Tony said something, you didn't hear what.

Loki was about ten steps away from you, staring at his hands. Then he looked up at you, terrified.

In a second you were running towards him. He reached out to you, stepping forward slowly.

His hands were gone by the time you got to him.

"No. God, no­-." your breaths were coming in great panicked gasps as you reached him and clung to him, your fingers digging into his arms, your heart thudding several times faster than it should have been.

Y/N-

"No stop, no, no-" you were repeating the word like a prayer, as if it could stop your soulmate fading away to nothingness before your eyes.

Loki looked down at you in dread and you met his gaze. He was there, in front of you. Then his arms weren't in your hands anymore; you clutched at air.

"Loki no, no-"

I love you.

His voice in your mind sounded as though he was thinking to you from the end of a very long tunnel.

His eyes didn't leave your face as his face disintegrated into ashes.

You were left stood by yourself, your arms out in front of you, convinced that you were having a heart attack, unable to draw a breath. For a few seconds you didn't move, staring at the ashes floating through the air in front of you.

Dizziness washed over you; your knees gave out and you dropped to the ground, breathing hard. Your heart was beating so painfully hard and fast that you reached up to claw at your chest.

And then you died.

At least, you thought you did. The first thought that entered your mind was that another meteor had landed on top of you and flattened you, but you remained conscious. Had you turned to ashes too?

This must be death. Real death this time, not like before.

You were nothing. You couldn't see, hear or sense anything; the ground had disappeared from under you, and the sky from above you.

There was no you anymore.

Just emptiness.

A void.

After a few seconds, or minutes, or hours, your senses returned. You were still crouched on the floor; your heart was still beating, your body intact.

The emptiness remained.

Loki had been wrong. It wasn't just a feeling in your chest. It was your entire self. Your whole being.

He had described it as though it hurt; it didn't. Not yet.

Your soul had been ripped from your chest.

Everything was numb.

You would never feel again. 

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