It's Okay, Draco

Chapter 41

The wind was cold, or maybe was my skin who had gooseflesh from how cold our conversation was about to be, which one was, I wasn't sure.

He was sat in this place, head down, not even flinching when I called his name, he was waiting for me, he knows well enough, and most probably had prepared all his speech awhile that, and I had nothing.

On a second thought perhaps it was better to turn around and leave, I was standing, at the top of the stairs, my body getting colder each time, and my cheeks getting red, but not from the cold, but from how embarrassing this looks.

"Are you going to be standing there the all night?" He asked coldly.

I've prepared myself for that, by how could this conversation would be, it was more than clearly it would be this way, but still, the coldness of his voice was painful to hear, like blades trespassing my ears.

I stepped forward, nervously, and sat besides him, not quite close to him, but not quite far either.

Flashes from the first day I came here, and found him, crossed my head.

I looked at the stars, playing with my fingers due to my nerves, hoping that he would be the one to talk, but like I said, only a miracle could make that hapen.

"I'm sorry." At least I managed to say that, but he didn't replied, he didn't even blinked, or showed any reaction to my sentence, he was clearly expecting me to say this. "Er- aren't you, going to say anything?" I asked with my voice trembling.

"What do you want me to say, Blackwell?" He asked coldly, and if I thought my body couldn't get any colder, then I was wrong.

"Fine. If you're going to be like that..." I started to stand up. "...Then I guess I'll just leave." I tried to get away from him, but I was stopped by his hand, grabbing my wrist.

"No! Please...stay."

I flinched at his words, he had never begged me for anything, I didn't even expected him to beg for anything, Draco Malfoy begging, was a whole new level, I couldn't even believe my own ears.

His grip was warm, his voice was ice, still, kindness and honesty could be found, resting among them, it felt like a void in the light, hear him begging, like the darkness begging for the light to shine, it would be incomplete without it.

I nodded slightly, and felt his grip loosened from my wrist, and I sat back down.

"Just-please say something." I begged, turning my gaze at him, but his gaze remained focused on the stars.

"Fine, you want me to say something, I will say it..." He said coldly, even in his voice, I could see how betrayed he felt. "You lied, saying you were taking time for you because of your mother, when instead, you were playing with magic with Potter, and now you want me to say what you don't want to hear." He said firmly and clearly, he didn't dared to look at me, and I thanked him for that, see the broken look in his eyes was the last thing I needed.

"Please just try to see my point Draco...I couldn't tell you, like you said, Harry and you aren't exactly the best friends ever, and...and I wanted to distract my mind, I was tired of Umbridge, and break the rules felt...right." I said softly, this wasn't a lie, I was being the most honest I could be, with him and with myself.

"I understand...that you were in a bad moment, still are, but..." He took a deep breath, as if deciding wether to continue or not. "You made my think I was helping you, when in the end was that bloody Potter..." He said, calmly, but still cold.

His sentence hit me, I didn't expected him to say that, still, I let each word sink in me, like a fish swims in the water.

"No, of course not Draco...you did help me, you don't know how lonely I felt there sometimes...you were on my mind more times than you think..." And more times than I would like to admit myself.