Through The Curtains

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It's a small request from this small author.

"YOU WORTHLESS BITCH, I HAVE WARNED YOU THOUSAND OF TIMES NOT TO CREATE ANY MELODRAMA THERE BUT YOU STILL MANAGED TO DO IT THERE. HOW DARE YOU TO CLING INTO SOMEONE LIKE SUMEDH WHO DOESN'T DESERVE YOU ? KEEP IT IN MIND THAT HE IS WAY BETTER FOR YOU. SO DON'T EVER TRY TO SNEAK FOR HIM. OUR ASHI IS THE ONLY ONE WHO DESERVES HIM AND SHE HAS ALL THE QUALITIES OF STANDING BESIDE HIM. SO IT WILL BE BETTER IF YOU OBEY MY ORDER AND KEEP DISTANCE FROM PRINCE SUMEDH."

Mother yells all those words to me when I stand there rooted on my spot just gazing at the floor controlling myself not to cry in front of her.Today, she has hurt me in the deepest level. She has made sure to show my place again. She has confronted me for being close with Prince Sumedh on the royal banquet.

She always makes sure to throw some obnoxious comments whenever I am around her only except the time of dinner. Apparently, she doesn't speak rudely to me infront of my father and Ashi but she doesn't leave me whenever she gets an opportunity to torment me. I won't say that my father actually loves me more than Ashi. But he cares for me a little and Ashi too. But my mother is the only one who thinks me totally useless for their family.

"Mom, I am just asking you one thing. Have you ever loved me in your whole life?"

I can't help but blurt out this question. This question has been always roaming in my mind for long time. I have never got the chance to ask her. Yeah, I am accepting that I am actually afraid of the answer. I am afraid if she really thinks myself thrive for them. Whenever she taunts me, I just somewhere feel that she is just scolding me. After her harsh words, I still somewhere keep faith on my mind that she actually loves me but she doesn't want to show it. May be she actually is just offended temporarily on me for not being able to fulfil her expectations. May be she just wants my perfection and so she always makes sure to scold me to make me rectify myself. After how much of venom filled up in her throat against me, I still believe that she is just being cold towards me for making me better in every fields. After how much she humiliates me, I still can't hate her.

What can I do? Call me insane. Then I guess that yeah, I am. After all she is my mother, my own biological mother who has given birth to me. Even if I want ,I still can't hate but love her.

Her expression switches off to a scowl as she throws daggers like glare in my direction. I just bow my head down chanting in my mind "Yes, she loves me" again and again. I just hope that she might say the words of my expectations.

"What type of question is it ,Mallika?"

She asks narrowing her eyes at me.

"Mom, please, you have to reply. I beg you "

I interwine my hands infront of her falling on my knees, my eyes watering at the thought of expecting a negative answer. Yes, today I just want answers. I want know about her feelings. I want to know if she has ever loved me for once in this life.

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