Don't Speak

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It was finally Friday

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It was finally Friday. I hadn't stopped smiling since the storm. I didn't know what happened and I didn't care, I was just glad it did. I had never kissed or been kissed by anyone like that. What happened? How did it happen? These are the questions I fixated on the rest of that night and all during the marching competition. The one thing I did know was we could no longer ignore it. It felt amazing to know how he felt about me. The speculating and overanalyzing had been making me crazy.

I also hated feeling like it was my fault or my misunderstanding. There was no possible way to misunderstand the kiss that he instigated. It was on a whole other level. I didn't know you could feel like that from just a kiss. Anytime I almost forgot or tried to downplay it my stomach flipped in consecutive somersaults and a warm feeling that made me crave seeing him again arose.

I had to get a handle on this before I shot off like a rocket through the hallways. It was already obvious to people like Devin at the party. I could only imagine what my face would give away now.

It was so hard not to say anything to Reagan or Lynn, but it was personal and private. If there were ever a time to hold my fire and keep my mouth shut to see how things go, it would be now. I was confident that we had crossed into new territory that would most likely require a conversation, but I also had to be realistic about how Adrian had presented thus far. 

When it came down to his jacket, I'd say that was the hardest part to figure out. It wasn't 1950. He hadn't just pinned me at the malt shop. What was I supposed to do, skip down the hallway wearing it? The most logical thing to do would have been to bring the jacket to school and simply return it to him like a normal, sane person. Logic suggests that if he had his tongue in my mouth swapping spit for a good five to ten minutes, he wouldn't mind if I simply gave him something that belonged to him.

However, every time I played that scenario out in my head, me smiling toward him, meeting him at his locker and passing his jacket off to him, all the eyes on us wondering why I had it in the first place... I could see that would be a nightmare for him, if he didn't want this, or he was embarrassed by me.

 I wasn't being hard on myself. There were a number of things that led me to think this way, like his behavior just after every other time we had a small encounter, and the phone situation or lack thereof. Adrian had never made an effort to call me or even ask for my number from Reagan or Lynn. That was strange. 

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