Brutally Honest Reviews™

I Have Been Tagged By One of Those Tagged Things, So Here I Am Doing "The Thing"

-Also, this is a cheap reason not to write a review at this very instance, and to also talk about myself (since I'm such a flaming narcissist!). Hoorah!

*Blame this person for enabling me:  CodeScarlet

Q: Do you like someone?

A: Nope. Unless if they're talented people that are in the league of Michael Jackson, then get them away from me.

Q: Do they like you back?

A: Wow, I'm in middle school again haha. Welp, everyone I do like--or er, admire?-- is dead, or out of my league. (Since I like to distance myself from anything that makes logical sense hahA, and I have the highest standards on Earth--for no reason.) Not even an exaggeration. So, I don't really know how that would be possible. And if some weird person did like me (in a romantic way,) hypothetically, that would suck for them because I'm an (grey) Aro/Ace. What are they thinking.

Q: Middle name?

A: Is this even a question? Whose middle name are you asking for? Are you asking me what "middle name" means? So many endless possibilites! Anyway, no, I don't have one. My parents only gave my second eldest sister a middle name, and said "Fuck them" to my sister and I.

Q: Are you single?

A: Yes, since birth. And thanks for that, relationships seem like an unnecessary stressor to me. Plus friendship breakups are already hard enough, so I'm gooD.

Q: Girl best friend?

A: I use to. The most recent one was in freshman year, but then we fell out because apparently I was "too mean"??? What the fuck, right? (Then we reconciled in senior year, and she keeps on trying to come on to me and it's weird as hell because she's engaged? And I'm Ace? She throws the most obvious weird hints and I just awkwardly laugh and walk away--it's a hilarious cycle.)

Q: Guy best friend?

A: No, not anymore. In the eighth grade I did, but then I moved away and that is how all of my friendships subside--I hate keeping in contact with people and I do the bare minimum. Yay!

Q: Fave OTP?

A: Finally, a question that I can appreciate. I have so many casual ones, it's ridiculous. I love making up relationships, or supporting other people's relationships because it has nothing to do with me--it's great! Anyway, it has to be Brangelina before they divorced and fucked me up, Diana Ross (high key reaching with this one) and Michael Jackson, and Heath Ledger and Michelle Williams. Every single one of them are dead too (the ships...and also two sixth of the people involved in them, hopefully that math is correct lol). *Holds back tears*

Q: Who's the last person you texted?

A: The girl I mentioned above, two hours ago, and before that it was last Wednesday (I think). I can either take ten years to reply to someone or two seconds--there's no in between.

Q: What's the last song you listened to?

A: Shit, I don't remember the name, but it was a Prince song.

Q: What's your battery percentage?

A: Ninety-nine percent, I have to steal my sister's charger every time she leaves the house because she's a stingy asshole.

Q: Lock screen?

A: Oh my god, seriously? Fuck you, this is a lot of unnecessary work.

Q: Reason you made Wattpad?

A: I wanted to read things, (also some shitty book titled Off the Grid pushed its way out of my bowels and I tried to pass it off as a cohesive story for a while until I got new glasses and was able to actually read it HA) but then I slowly realized most of the books on here were trash so I started leaving longs complaints--I mean, "unwarranted critiques" on people's books and got a lot of people angry, and got weakly "dragged". Then, this book happened lmao!

Q: Birthdate?

A: Why do I feel like these are a bunch of security questions? 6/2/99. I don't care, do with it what you will.

Q: Can you add twenty tags?

A: *Looks for a "please"* *Does not find one* 

I don't know, can I? No. No, I can't.

You're welcome. I'm done. Onto productive things now!