Tomorrow, Today (COMPLETED)

Determination

These past few weeks been a rollercoaster journey for Jinyoung and he felt bad for lying to the Ahgases about the Wang gae Park gae drama that turned out bigger than they thought. Fans keep bringing it up, their SNS is filled with pictures of Jackson piggy back Jinyoung. In the other hand, Jinyoung feels relieved because there seems to be no rumor whatsoever about his sickness. He plays his card very well like usual. He knows JYP is also involved, that's why he lost some of his work. He doesn't even have practice schedule after the chemo, and the job he's doing is mainly radio, short photoshoot, or interviews. He doesn't even get to be on video stream platform. He's being limited to appear in public. Of course Jinyoung doesn't want to complain though, he knows JYP hyung is just worried. A day after his first chemo, a huge package was delivered to his house. It's filled with organic vegetables and expensive herbal medicine. The package didn't have a name on it but Jinyoung knew it was from JYP PDnim himself. When Jinyoung called him, the soft hyung just told him to eat well. He'll forever be thankful for the kindness of his CEO. Jinyoung's mother was so happy with the package and she went straight to the kitchen, making ginger drink for Jinyoung which really helped with the nauseaus. At least it's the only thing Jinyoung could drink without throwing it up right away.
Days gone by without any incident after that. Jinyoung feels better as the side effects of the chemo wand off. He doesn't feel as nauseous and he can control his headache better. He only feel a little sore and fatigue but not more. After the vomiting episode is lessen, he could eat and drink more.
But as his head became clearer, he came to a realization that the agreement he made with JYP hyung is almost due. A month is really short and soon he'll have to announce to everyone that he will go on temporary hiatus because of his sickness.

Jinyoung tries not to think of it too much because everythime the thoughts resurface, he'd feel nauseous and anxious .

He would burrow himself reading book dr Song gave him. It's actually good and Jinyoung is enjoying it.

The members of GOT7 still asking how he is doing everyday. Even Jackson who is busy with his Wang Team gives him message everyday, Mark Tuan sent Jinyoung prototypes of his new clothing line's product and actively asks Jinyoung to give ratings, Youngjae likes to send random pics of Coco, Bambam and Yugyeom just being YugBam sending lots of random memes. Sometimes, Jinyoung replies them, but most of the times he doesn't. Looks like all of them want Jinyoung's mind to be occupied with other things than his illness and the hiatus announcement.Of course it's nice. But at this point, reading the member's messages only reminds him that he'll have to leave them and the showbiz world really soon.
Days gone by real quick for Jinyoung. A day before the announcement, they all gather in JYP's office. They don't talk much. The laughter that usually accompanies them whenever they are together isn't heard. The CEO himself don't talk much. He only asks Jinyoung how he's doing and the later smiles and says that he's fine. The air feels heavy especially for Jinyoung. He feels like all eyes are on him and that he's the one responsible for everything that will happen from now on. All the pain, the guilt, the feeling of being a burden suddenly comes back to him it's suffocating.
When the whole division 2 staffs and crews join their meeting, it gets worse. Jinyoung feels like he's being judged by everyone in the room. The greetings from the staffs are weak, Jinyoung has to remind himself millions times that it's all only in his head, they are just being sympathetic instead of blaming him.
S

eems like the anxiety is not only his. GOT7 members are sitting next to each other, busy with their cellphones.
"If everyone is here, lets start the meeting", JYP leads, his voice is deep and firm.
"As we all planned, tomorrow we're going to hold press confrence regarding Jinyoung's health state and GOT7 activities during Jinyoung's hiatus".
Jinyoung's stomach rolls when he hears his name being mentioned.
"So far there's nothing strange in the news nor in the SNS so we assume everything is clear".
JB holds Jinyoung's hand under the table. Because of their team work, they managed to escape the fans suspicion. Thank God it's almost winter, so fans don't notice Jinyoung's weightloss as they are always using thick clothes for protection from the cold weather.
"We are going to hold press confrence tomorrow 10a.m. We have contacted all media representatives and they're looking forward to...", the staff suddenly stops talking as she notices that she may picks the wrong sentence. She glances at Jinyoung before continuing her report, "but we cn assure you that no information is spreading".
JYP nods his head, pleased that everything is going as planned.
"Are you sure that you are going to handle this on your own, kids?" JYP asks the members of GOT7 once again, "Jinyoung, if it's too hard for you, we can always fax or e-mail the media about your condition. No need to come out and say the news yourself".
Indeed, usually a talent agency would just send an official letter to the media if they want to make announcement. The talents themselves don't usually show their faces in front of the media. Some of them write letters then sent to the media or give the announcement via SNS.
Jinyoung shakes his head, "all this time we've been always being honest to the fans. We've kept this secret long enough and I feel guilty to the fans. I need them to know that I have this illness but I will fight it and I want them to see that I mean every word. It's going to be easier for me if I have something to hold on to. Like it or not, I still have to announce it anyway. If anything happens, I want the fans to know from me, not from rumors or from some random articles on the magazines. I think it's going to be hard not only for me, but also for the group. But I want to deal with it like a real man should".
All the staffs are looking at Jinyoung now, they are surprised with the young man's courage and determination.
JB lats Jinyoung's nape with pride. The words from Jinyoung erases all the doubts and weariness in his heart. JB can't agree more to what Jinyoung has stated and he's also determined to help him and give him strength to face the media. It's true that it has to be the 7 of them. 7 or nothing. If anything happens, they all are responsible. JB looks at other member's face and glad that they all have the same looks full of determination.
JYP looks proud too, "gurae.. I trust you with all my heart".
"After Jinyoung give announcement, we will continue our individual works to give him time for treatment", JB continues, "we will have separate meetings with you all. We already discussed about this before and we hope that division 2 and the staff can lend the hands to keep supporting us".
All thr staffs nod.
"So let's hope that it will all go well tomorrow", JYP says when the meeting is ending. He takes a deep breath and stands up, "I believe I've raised one of the greatest idol of all times. Not all idols have the same courages, sincerity, wit and determination like you guys here. You are not only a bunch if idols, but you are a bunch of personalities, talents, but more importantly, you guys are a bunch of good people. Don't be too worried about your future, because I believe that you can always have a comeback at any time and still going to nail everything you have to offer. I'm proud of all of you. JYPE will always support you and your career. Overcome this, and you can overcome everything.".
"Jinyoung ah", JYP PDnim turns his head to Jinyoung, "I'm more than proud of you. Don't think of anything, just focus on getting better. I trust you and GOT7. Do whatever you need to do, hyung have your back".
Jinyoung can't hold his tears. He breaks down hearing his CEO. Some staffs are also crying, some are clapping emotionally.
JB and Mark who are sitting closest to Jinyoung give him pat on his back.
Jinyoung feels safer now as he is assured everyone is willing to understand him.
Next morning, GOT7 arrive at JYP building earlier. Everyone is being informed that GOT 7 will make major announcement so people in the building already feel the tension early in the morning. Jinyoung is pretty sure all the staff in the building already aware of his condition after yesterday's meeting so he doesn't see any reason to avoid them. He's pretty glad though because they seem to act like usual. One or two persons gave him sympathetic looks but they still tried their best not to mention anything about his wellbeing. Mostly they just give Jinyoung pat on his shoulders and move on.
All members of GOT7 feel the tension but they don't say anything. In front of Jinyoung, they act like usual. Chatting, laughing and eating the healthy snacks the CEO provides in the small room beside the meeting room. The staff told them they will be called if the press are ready.
But the truth is, all of them are nervous. The palms of their hands are clamp and sweaty. They all couldn't sleep last night thinking about today.
They are all nervous about how the press would deliver the news, but more importantly they are nervous about the fan's reaction.
"We have the best fans in the world, the nicest fans. I'm sure they will all support us. I'm sure they will all support you", JB said to Jinyoung on the meeting.
Jinyoung tries to memorize JB's words in his head but it's still hard. There's still wars going on in his head. He knows he already has been given so many assurance from people all around him, even from his CEO and GOT7 members. But he still can't shake bad thoughts out of his head. He still have insecurities and worries. He told himself dozens of times that he already made a commitment and he's going to make a comeback as soon as possible and be on stage, singing and dancing, and acting. Things that he loves so much. But then, he also thinks about what if it isn't as easy as he thinks. What if he belongs to that less than 20% people who don't survive this. What if people forget about him. What if he won't be able to stand on stage again. Those negative thoughts linger in his head over and over again he feels like exploding.
He didn't have appetite this morning so he only ate a little portion of rice porridge his mom made him. The nauseaus is back, but Jinyoung thinks it's more because of his nervousness. He managed to keep it at bay though. At least he doesn't want to faint in front of the mass media.
Jackson approach Jinyoung and gives him a hug because why not. And then there's Bambam, Youngjae, Yugyeom, Mark and JB. The seven of them form a circle with their hands connected to each other.
They don't have to say anything. Just being with GOT7 make them comfortable. They feel stronger and they are ready for anything throw at them. Together they will win the fight.
"Sorry, the press are ready for you", one staff comes in.
GOT7 look at each other faces.
"Okay boys, let's do this", JB gives them order.
All the members nod and they all go following their leader.