Tomorrow, Today (COMPLETED)

Breakdown

The air is getting colder as the winter comes, the first snow fell two days ago and the temperature dropped ever since. As the christmas is getting closer, the joy is palpable in the air. Lots of houses put christmas ornaments on the doors. Because the neighborhood where Jinyoung currently living is rather upscale, most houses have tall doors and fences to protect the residence from any form of exposures. But apparently it doesn't stop them from showing off. Of course not all households celebrate Christmas in Korea. But when they do, they don't do it half assed. One house near Jinyoung's put a giant Santa Claus in their backyard. Jinyoung wouldn't notice if the hat of the Santa Claus is not so tall surpasses the fence. Other house puts up christmas decorations along the fence and lits up so many lights it's almost like a carnival. Bambam got so excited looking at the decorations he wanders around the neighborhood so many times , taking pictures and getting excited like a kid. Bambam doesn't come home to Thailand because he doesn't celebrate Christmas. But he is already used to Christmas celebration in Korea. 
Today he helps Jinyoung's family decorating the Christmas tree at Jinyoung's temporary residence. Jinyoung's dad and oldest sisters are out buying groceries while his mother  and other sister busy cleaning the kitchen. Jinyoung's father and sisters came from Jinhae to Seoul because of Jinyoung's health. The weather is too cold for Jinyoung to commute to Jinhae, plus he's getting extra side effects from the chemo.
He's been experiencing pain on his joints almost every day now. Sometimes it's only minor so he can just ignore it, but sometimes it's so painful he can barely walk. When it happens, his mom would massage him gently with warmer pad and the pain would slowly fading into a dull throb. Other side effect is bruising and bleeding easily. Jinyoung was quite panicked when he brushed his teeth one day and the brush hurt his gum and it bled like a bitch. He wasn't aware at first, he just wondered why his toothpaste became red. Then he realized it was blood. He yelled to get his mom who also got panicked. The bleeding stopped mercifuly, but he's not allowed to use normal toothbrush anymore. He's using toothbrush for children that has softer brush and he hates it. It has cute animal prints on it,  Jinyoung wants to throw it away everytime he brushes his teeth. He can't stand the smell of lots of things that he used to love. He can't stand coffee, ramyeon, air freshner, grass, trees, he can't even stand the smell of freshly cooked meat. Damn, he still loves those things. Just not the smell, please. And he has to be aware of his meal. Make a wrong move, and he'll end up moving his quarter to the toilet. He said he's friend with toilet bowl one night and he held it tight while throwing up his gut.
He also has to wear mask all the time because apparently, chemo weakens his immune system to the point that even a simple flu bug have a potential to kill him.
At least he still has his hair intact, Jinyoung often thinks about it. He's been pretty worried about it since the first time he heard about having chemotherapy.
"Hyung, can I put the star on top of the tree now?", Bambam asks Jinyoung, his eyes sparkling.
"No, you have to finish the decoration on the bottom first before putting the star. Why did  you have to bring lots of ornaments anyway. Look at the star, it's too big", Jinyoung's voice muffles because of his mask.
"It's christmas, we have to have more!", Bambam chuckles, "don't you see other houses? Do you know the house on the corner put reindeers in front of the house?".
"It's good to be excited over christmas. But it's not the point. We have to be more humble and reflect on ourself".
"Gosh, why are you so serious about everything?", Bambam sulks, he begins to decorate the tree with big Santa plushies, "I'm going to make this tree look amazing, with or without your consent".
When they're done, the tree looks more like a big pile of plushies. Bambam insists that they have to put everything on it, it barely has empty space. Jinyoung's dad and oldest sister come in and surprised to see the fluffy christmas tree.
"Omo, the tree is so cute!", she squeals, "I don't think our Jinyoungie did this. He doesn't have any sense".
"Noona!", Jinyoung scolds his sister.
Bambam laughs, feeling proud of his art work.
"We never had a christmas tree this lavish. Only small tree with some ornaments. It doesn't feel like christmas. Big tree like this is good. Dad, we should do it like this every year", Jinyoung's sisters looks at the details of the ornaments closely, "the light is so pretty. And look how big the star is. All Christmas stars should be like this".
Bambam grins widely and throws Jinyoung his most annoying mug. Jinyoung rolls his eyes.
Jinyoung's dad praises Bambam for his hardwork and offers him beer which the younger man takes gratefully.
"So are you guys going to go to church tomorrow?", Bambam asks while sipping his beer, "Oh this is good, too bad you can't drink this".
"I'm never good with alcohol to begin with so I don't really mind", Jinyoung swats his hands, "I don't think we're going".
"Wae?".
"Because we're in Seoul, showing up in public place will get us noticed.. So I think praying at home".
"Boys, time for dinner!", Jinyoung's mom shout from the kitchen.
Bambam shouts and runs straight to the kitchen. While Jinyoung is feeling hesitant, he knows the kitchen is filled with all sorts of delicious aroma, but he doesn't think his stomach would agree.
Jinyoung choose to stay at the living room, looking at the big tree they just decorated. Jinyoung chuckles, he secretly agrees to what his sister said. They never had a christmas this glamorous. They just go to the church, have christmas dinner, and that's it. Having  Bambam with them really makes everything different. He's so talkative and excited with everything. He's like the opposite of Jinyoung's personality. Apparently, the excitement is contagious because the quiet father of Park household becomes more lively after Bambam came. He laughs a lot, something that's rarely seen. He's always that tough but wise kind of father.
After having dinner, Jinyoung starts to feel sleepy. He excuses himself to bed, but Bambam follows him.
"Hyung, can I sleep with you here tonight?".
"Why? What about your cats?", Jinyoung shows his annoyed face to Bambam.
"It's already late, and I'm feeling a bit drunk", Bambam pleads 
"Then you can sleep in the guest's room. Why sleeping with me?".
"You know I'm a scaredy cat. Just one night?", Bambam shoots his puppy eyes to Jinyoung, "please? I'll sleep on the floor".
"No way. Sleep in the guest room, or living room, or just go home", Jinyoung says sternly. He walks to his room and closes the door. Bambam sighs.
The next morning, Bambam finds himself sleeping on the sofa in the living room with thick blanket wrapped around his body. He must've fallen asleep. He drank too much last night. Jinyoung's sisters are really strong at drinking they both made Bambam drink a lot too. They had fun chatting and laughing all night long. Bambam doesn't understand why Jinyoung is so different than those two.
It's still early, but he can smell freshly brewed coffee. Must be Jinyoung's mom. Great, Bambam need something to get rid of the after effect of the alcohol.
"Morning, Bambam ah. Did you sleep well?", Jinyoung's mom greets him. She sounds very cheerful, "I made coffee. What do you want for breakfast, dear? I'll make anything you want".
"Thank you eomonni, I'm going to wash up first. Can I wake Jinyoung hyung?".
"Please, dear. You know he's not a morning person though".
"Yes, of course I know", Bambam chuckles, heading to Jinyoung's room.
"Hyung, wake up", Bambam knocks Jinyoung's door. Bambam calls for Jinyoung several times. It's no surprise though. Jinyoung doesn't like to get up early, all members in GOT7 are aware of that. When Bambam keeps getting no answer, he tries to open the door but it's locked. Bambam suddenly feels worried, "Jinyoung hyung, please open the door!".
Bambam knocks louder, Jinyoung's mom comes hearing the noise.
"What happened?"
"Jinyoung hyung locked the door and he doesn't respond to me".
Jinyoung mom's face changes suddenly, she runs to wake her husband. Jinyoung's father comes in a rush, knocking Jinyoung's door.
"Jinyoung ah, are you there? Are you okay? Can you hear me?", he keeps knocking but still no answer.
Jinyoung's mom stands behind his husband, her expression is grim, she tries her best to surpress he her tears.
"Hyung, please open the door!", Bambam shouts.
"Wae?", Jinyoung's sister Boo young comes out while Soo Young is walking behing her joining the commotion. Apparently, the noise wakes them up.
"Jinyoung hyung is locking his door and he won't come out".
"I'll go check through the window", Booyoung says and dashes out.
"Jinyoung ah, I'm going to break the door", Jinyoung's father says, "please answer. Let us know you're okay".
"Hyung, are you okay?", Bambam asks worriedly because there's still no response.
"Dad's going to break the door, Jinyoung ah, you better not stay close to the door".
Then Bambam hears a soft sob.
"Sshhh.. ", Bambam tells everyone to stay quiet, "I hear something".
Bambam sticks his ear to the door, the  sobbing continues.
"Jinyoung hyung, are you crying? What's the matter?".
Bambam gets really worried, he knocks again.
"Should we break the door?", Jinyoung's dad asks.
"Jinyoung hyung, we're going in. Stay out of the door".
"GO AWAY!!", Bambam hears Jinyoung is shouting. His sobbing is now can be clearly heard.
Meanwhile Booyoung comes back, "the windows are locks and the curtains are closed".
"Jinyoung hyung, what's wrong. Are you hurt?".
"JUST GO AWAY!!", Jinyoung shouts again.
"If you don't let us in, we'll have to break in!", Jinyoung father stern voice sounds intimidating.
"If you break in, I'll hurt myself", Jinyoung threats, his voice is clearly shaking. Bambam can only imagine how messy his hyung's state right now. He never saw Jinyoung lost temper before. Jinyoung is always the most well organized person and he  always stays calm.
They try to persuade Jinyoung to open the door but it doesn't work. They can only hear him sobbing. Jinyoung's mom and sisters are sitting on the couch, they are crying silently, not wanting the youngest brother to feel intimidated.
"Abeoji, this isn't going to work. I'm going to call JB hyung, he'll know what to do. He always knows how to handle Jinyoung hyung", Bambam tells Jinyoung's dad who agrees to the idea.
Bambam pulls his handphone and calls the leader right away. The older man picks up the phone quickly. JB knows Bambam is sleeping over at Jinyoung's house and he has a hunch that Bambam calls him because if Jinyoung.
"Yeoboseyo, what's up Bam?"
"Hyung, where are you now? Can you come to Jinyoung hyung's house. We have emergency".
JB stands up immediately from his bed, "I'm at my parent's house. I'll come right away".
It usually takes about 30 minutes from JB's parent's house to Gangnam district, but JB makes it under 20 minutes. He can't take his mind off Jinyoung while driving and he really wants to get to Jinyoung's house as fast as he can.
"What's wrong?", JB asks Bambam. The tounger already wait for him at the front door. Bambam looks panicked and JB can see he's crying.
"Jinyoung hyung won't come out from his room. We already tried to persuade him but he doesn't listen. We were going to break in but he said he would hurt himself if we did. He's crying hyung. I don't know what happens, last night he was okay".
JB practically runs inside and he sees Jinyoung's family gather outside of his room. His mom and sisters are crying without voice. When Jinyoung's mom sees JB, she immediately hugs him.
"Jaebum ah, please tell Jinyoung to come out. I'm very worried", she cries.
JB knocks the door, "Jinyoung ah, it's Jaebum hyung, are you there?".
JB can hear sobbing from inside the room.
"Jinyoung ah.. please open the door".
"Go away hyung", Jinyoung's voice is cracking and weak. Seems like he's been crying for some times, JB thinks.
JB is worried, but he has to stay calm.
"Jinyoung ah, you know I came all the way here. It's christmas eve but I came here anyway. Talk to me... I will stay here until you open this door, all day if I need to. Until tomorrow, until the next day I will wait for you. Don't test me Park Jinyoung. You know I will do anything".
JB sits in front of the door, he makes a gesture to all people in the room to just let him be and ask them to leave him. The whole family decide to trust JB, Jinyoung's dad hugs his mom who's still crying, "what about you make something for us? Jinyoung will need more strength when he comes out later".
"Girls, can you help your mom in the kitchen?", he orders both of his daughter who immediately guides their mom to the kitchen. 
"Bambam ah, you go with me. I think I'm going to need a company", then they move to living room.
"Jinyoung ah, I'm sitting in front of your door. I will keep sitting here. You know your mom already cooked you breakfast. You have to eat, you hear me Park Jinyoung?".
"I drove here, you know. It's a miracle that it'a not crowded. The traffic is usually annoying at Christmas eve".
"Hey Jinyoung ah, do you remember our security at the old apartment? I met him last night. He's fine and he already has a new job".
"Jinyoung ah, Nora went to the vet two days ago. She got so scared I had to hold her. I don't know why though. She went to the vet regularly, it's the first time she got scared".
Just like that, JB keeps on talking from in front of the door. Time passes by, it's almost an hour since JB arrivedand he's still talking. Jinyoung's family and Bambam stay at their place. They don't want to bother JB.
JB is about to give up when he hears the key is clicking. JB startled, he stands up immediately.
All eyes on JB now, but JB tells them to stay.
"Jinyoung ah, I'm going in. It's just me, don't be afraid".
JB opens the door slowly. The room is still dark, the curtains are all closed. JB can recognize Jinyoung'a figure sitting on the bed. He covers himself with his blanket to his head. He's facing backward so JB can't see his face.
"Jinyoung ah, gwenchana? What's wrong?", JB walks closer to Jinyoung. The younger one is still sobbing slowly. JB turns around so he can stand in front of Jinyoung. Jinyoung still bury his face on the blanket.
"Jinyoung ah, talk to hyung.. What happened? Why did you lock yourself? Why don't you want to meet your family and Bambam?".
JB tries to reach for Jinyoung but the younger one fliches away.
JB sighes, talking to Jinyoung is tricky. He has to know when and what to say or his mood is going to plunge.
JB sits next to Jinyoung, "Jinyoung ah, hyung is here, and I'm going to be here whenever you need me. You don't want to talk, okay. I'll just sit here. As long as we have each other, it's okay. Right, Jinyoung ah?".
"Hair...", Jinyoung says hoarsely.
"What did you say?".
"My hair...".
JB suddenly realizes soemthing, he abruptly gets us, switching on the lamp. What he sees makes him terrified. Hair strands are scattering on Jinyoung's bed.
"Jinyoung ah, what happened?", KB asks carefully. He doesn't want to trigger the younger man.
Jinyoung sobs, "I woke up and my head wss itchy.. when I scratched, hair fell of.. I scratched again and I had lumps of hair tangled in my fingers".
JB goes to Jinyoung, trying to open his cocoon.
"Hyung, I'm the visual of GOT7, I can't look bad... I can't loose my hair, I can't be idol without hair. I'm ugly! Fans will hate me, hyung!", Jinyoung still tries to defend his sanctuary. Even when he's not feeling 100%, Jinyoung is still very strong.
"Jinyoung ah, please", JB pleads, he's really terrified of what he will see when he opens the blanket.
"Jinyoung ah, stop! That's an order!", JB finally give Jinyoung warning.
It works, Jinyoung stops fighting him.
JB can sense the younger one is shivering under the blanket. JB slowly lifts the blanket up.
Jinyoung is almost unrecognizable, his face is red and his eyes are swollen and his cheeks are puffy. He's still crying, his face is filled with tears. He looks small and miserable.
Strands of hair can be seen on his t-shirt. JB looks at Jinyoung's head and gasps. Some spots are now bald, the skin is red and even bleeding. Looks like Jinyoung had scratched his head so hard it bled. He probably pulled his hair with force and hurt his scalp.
"Jin.. jinyoung ah, what have you done??", JB'a voice is shaking.
JB can't hold himself. He hugs Jinyoung tight and lets his tears flow.