Rob has been on and off with Thierry, his closeted lover, when suddenly a tall mysterious stranger enters the House of Representatives (2e Kamer). His dark curly hair and the smoldering look in his eyes are a recipe for disaster. Their political pa...
As we wait for our drinks to arrive I see him vividly shivering. I am as well, but even though I'm freezing cold, he manages to ignite a fire within me.
We're sitting in a booth in the back of the small cafe. The little bench is wooden, so is the table and the floor, and pretty much everything in this place as well. I like it though, it's nice and cozy. The lighting is not too harsh, and if it weren't for the waiters walking around, it would feel like we were alone in this joint.
He lays his hands in his lab, rubbing them to warm them up. The scars littering his knuckles are colored a dark purple due to the cold.
He notices me staring as he puts his hands in the pockets of his pants and sits back leaning into the bench, stretching his legs.
'Don't.'
I say to him, to which he doesn't respond immediately. His jaw tenses tightly.
I reach out my hand to him and keep it up. I don't push him or try to overstep any boundaries, I allow him to come to me, which I pray he does. I feel a rush of vulnerability, yet I'm very aware of his momentarily as well.
He doesn't move, and I'm kind of starting to feel like an idiot holding my hand out to him for this long, but I can feel that he wants to take it, something is stopping him and I can't seem to pinpoint what it is.
We're sitting quite sheltered here, no one would be able to see. I understand that he would be scared. Being openly gay is a risk in our line of work. Even showing affection to another man could raise questions and suspicion, that's why Thierry wanted to keep us on the down low, which I absolutely respect.
Sometimes I dream of a place where there is no gay or straight, no black or white, no man or woman, a place where we just exist, just be.
Not too often, because coming back to reality pains me terribly.
I might not live to see the day where society would come close to my imagination, and maybe it never will, but I want to contribute as much as I can to achieve a place where everyone can be happy exactly the way they are. Without judgment and fear.
Sometimes I feel a sliver of that whenever I'm around Jesse, I can somehow sense that he carries no true hatred in his heart. It's fragile and buried, nonetheless, but I have seen it, his purity, I know that it's in there.
I try to reach that part of his heart as we speak, still holding out my hand. I laid it openly in my lab because it was getting a bit heavy. I try to make eye contact with him, but he keeps his stare focused straight onto the kitchen.
The waiter comes with our hot chocolate, which I might be a little too excited about. I eat the whipped cream off the top within a matter of seconds, whilst still keeping my hand in my lab.
I can feel him watching me, and chuckle at my desire for chocolate-tasting whipping cream.
I'm completely in my own world, enjoying my drink as I suddenly feel his hand slip into mine, his fingers interlocking with mine. I don't look at him and keep my eyes focused on my delicious drink, but I squeeze his hand tightly nevertheless.
His thumb strokes the inside of my wrist, and I can feel goosebumps forming there. His touch is electrifying. My lungs are betraying me, as with every stroke he takes my breath becomes shorter and tighter.
I try to focus and lay my other hand on top of his in my lab, brushing my fingers over the tiny scars around his knuckles. My fingertips follow the path of scars connected to each other, reaching over the entire top part of his hand.
He swallows harshly, as his eyes grow dark and foreign, he is withdrawing, I can feel his walls go up.
'They're beautiful.'
I catch him by surprise as I see his eyebrows knit in confusion.
I don't ask about them, because I'm pretty certain he doesn't want to talk about them. Besides, he'll tell me whenever he's comfortable to do so, whenever he's ready.
We sit there for a little while in silence. It's actually nice. Whenever I'm with Thierry, I would always try to find some subject to talk about.
But with him, I don't need words floating between us to tie together any disparities, to fill the void established by our connection.
There's just us.
I held on as tightly as he held onto me, revelling in eachother's presence.
We're interrupted by our waiter as he brings me my phone, I had asked if anyone may have had a charger, and they took my phone out back to charge. It hasn't been fifteen minutes since, but the waiter says this is the fourth time it rang.
I take my phone from him and see two voicemails. I'd expected them to be from Thierry, but as I open them it's not his voice that I hear, it's his sisters'.
The background noise leads me to believe she is at some sort of party. Over the loudness I hear some of her words, but I'm not able to make full sentences of what she's saying. Something about Thierry, danger, and that I should come.
I excuse myself from our table and walk outside to give her a call back. She picks up on the first ring and calls out my name. I try to slow her down but she seems panicked. I ask her where she is but I can't make it up from her words. I tell her to text me the address, which I receive immediately.
I walk back inside to tell Jesse I have to leave. After our afternoon it's the last thing I want to do, and it hurts me that I have to leave him like this, leave us, but Thierry's sister sounded very distressed and pleaded for me to come.
I explain myself to Jesse and he offers to walk me to my car. Or, well, demands to do so.
When I tell him about my plan to call a taxi, he dismisses the idea without another word and stands up determinedly to drive me there.
I pay for our drinks, which he is quite displeased about, but he paid for our clothing so I made him accept it.
We walk to his car and once inside I type in the address in his built in navigation system. Not that I would need it, I already know the way there...
Ups! Tento obrázek porušuje naše pokyny k obsahu. Před publikováním ho, prosím, buď odstraň, nebo nahraď jiným.
