19. Painful Passion

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Chapter 19

Painful Passion

Mary’s POV

My heart is aching horribly today, but I pretend I’m fine. This is Kate’s evening and I don’t want to miss it by staying in bed. We are reaching the big field after walking there in Kate’s slow pace, but my heart is speeding in exhaustion. I hope I will survive the evening without letting anyone see how ill I am. It takes a lot of effort to not cradle my arms over my chest.

I hate being sick. I can’t spell the word hate in big enough letters. I am a Ninjan; I’m not supposed to be weak! I don’t want to sulk for the rest of my life, but it is hard to get over. It will only be over once I’m dead. I’m terrified of death. Not death itself, I’m more concerned about how my family will cope without me. It won’t be easy for them.

Jupiter is probably here, but I can’t sense him. I wish I could. I miss him terribly and I am struggling against feeling any need for him. Why can’t it be comfortable like he told me it may be? It’s mostly my selfish wish that he will remove the pain with his mere touch. I’m so greedy for it.

Fires are already being lit on the various fireplaces and the whole Pack is sitting on picnic blankets on the ground, waiting for our arrival. They are chatting and don’t pay us much attention as we make our way over to where Princess and Vincent have saved us a spot.

I glare at Princess carefree attitude with a hope that she can feel my emotional daggers. She makes eye contact with me as she turns around; surprised over my hostile energy towards her. She waves awkwardly but I just stomp up to her and push her roughly so she stumbles a few steps back. My heart hurts like hell, but it is worth it. I’m too angry to care.

“What do you mean by dragging Kate around?” I hiss emotionlessly the way Mother usually does. Mother would never push anyone like that though.

“What do you mean?” Princess wonders completely unaware of what she did.

“As an Alpha I think you should know,” I mutter and turn my back against her to find a place to sit on the blanket. There’s no point to discuss with a clueless royalty and I’m afraid I’ll fall over if I insist on arguing.

“Kate?” Princess asks my triplet sister and I watch Kate frown because she doesn’t want to tell her for some reason I can’t understand. It’s not easy to hurt Princess feelings.

“You bruised my arms badly when you dragged me over to Jane’s house,” she says quietly. “Other than that I’m alright. I healed.”

Princess hits her head a few times and Vincent grabs her arms so she doesn’t hurt herself.

“I’m really sorry!” she cries out to Kate. “I’m so stupid, but all I could think of was that cake-stealing…”

“Princess Ray!” Mother stops her rambling. “Never again.”

“Never again,” Princess agrees and takes a few steps back at the legendary teacher’s request. Vincent massages where she hit herself on the head, but she’s not the slightest bit embarrassed over what she did. “Well let’s start the welcome party!” she yells and walks up to the bonfire in the middle of the crowd.

A pack member gives her a torch and she throws it to set the logs on fire. A loud cheer breaks out and people start to load their grills with food. I don’t cheer with them; I don’t have energy for it. I want to lie down and rest. I do that and close my eyes with a small smile on my lips. I could die like this.

“Hey Kate!” I hear Princess’ best friend yell and I pry my eyes open to see my poor Kate being swamped into Jason’s arms. “You have grown so much since I saw you last time!”

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