The Sinfully Wedded

Chapter 49

Jasmine's POV...

There are a lot of ways people grieve. Some grieve in a more complicated way than others. Some stick to the book, going through the five stages before healing. 

But I wonder if anyone's ever skipped ahead?

Denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and finally acceptance. What if a person doesn't go through the stages and just accepts it? Is that a bad thing? Am I a bad person for only taking a day-

No, a few hours to grieve my father as he laid in my arms? 

Maybe I am. Even though he was rarely there, maybe I am the bad guy. He was my father, after all. I should've loved him unconditionally, right? 

When my mother passed, it hurt. It still does. I hurt thinking about the memories we were robbed of together. The time we didn't get to have was out of her control and mine. Before that happened, I was her first priority. She loved me more than anything and showed it. 

That's why I miss her more.

My father chose to dismiss me. Memories that could've been made, weren't. Because he shut me out. He didn't care for anything to do with me. 

"It hurts. It hurts like hell," I said to Sinn. And I meant it from the bottom of my heart. But it doesn't hurt the same. I'll long for memories we could've had when he was here, when he had that option and I'll hold that grudge against him until I die. 

I loathe him for it. For waiting so long to be my dad. 

Yesterday was hard. Today I woke up and didn't feel anything. And for that, I feel guilty.

After waking up, I sat in bed, staring at the gift he'd gotten for me. At first, I contemplated not opening it. How special could the gift be, considering he doesn't know much about me? 

"Whatever," I murmured and pulled it closer. The gold ribbon was soft between my fingers as I pulled it open. It fell to the sides of the box, allowing me to pull open the lid. "Oh," I widened my eyes in shock as I stared down at the familiar jewelry placed inside. 

Mom's jewelry. 

There was a note placed on top of it all.

I can never give back what's been taken from you. And I'm sorry for that. But I can give you at least this much. She probably wishes you'd gotten it sooner.

I set it aside and picked up one of her necklaces. A smile pulled at my lips as I remembered the nights she'd worn each of them. There were a few I didn't recognize but they were just as beautiful as the rest. 

I spotted a diamond necklace that she cherished more than the others. She'd rarely worn it and was very protective of it. One day, when I was around six years old, I got into her closet. She'd left her safe open as she was cleaning everything out. 

I grabbed the diamond necklace and ran around with it, wrapping it around my doll's neck and acting like it was some toy. 

"Caught you, thief!"  

I gasped in surprise as I swiveled around. She stood at my doorway, pointing at me with her eyes thinned, her face full of suspicion. My mouth was agape and my face turned bright red. I got caught red-handed. 

I bowed my head, glancing at the diamonds from the corner of my eye. They were just so pretty, I couldn't resist. "I'm sorry, mommy." As she stepped forward and kneeled in front of me,  my mouth made a pout and tears formed in my eyes.

I'd never felt so guilty. I knew I was wrong and shouldn't have done it. 

"You know better," She said in a soft voice, placing her warm, soft hands on my face and gently wiping my tears. "Here," She sighed and took the necklace off of the doll. Then she placed it around my neck.