Chapter Twenty-one

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Rochelle's pov

Everywhere was a continuous reminder of him. Gosh, why on earth was everyone looking at me with the same old horrible pity looks and for what? I was just trying to get by on my day to move on now, to stop living the past as the future was yet to come anyways. I had Jessasnym drove his car to the hockey house even though i simply refused to return back to the ice rink to watch him practice because it make it worse since everywhere i go lead me back to us however, i was still wearing his old hockey jersey in a pair of comfy legging and trainers whilst walking toward the music room skipping lunch each week until i was sick of it so i drove my car to the nearest bar to sing my heart, eating sweet potato french fries or either of them. Avenna went alongside me in the car ride to bar after we decided to go visit her oldest brother Henderson as she was on the phone to him i was decided to go to new york or Korea right now in this moment i pulled my knees closer to my chest in the car being the passenger princess beside from that Avenna pulled at the mall car park.

"How are you holding up with the whole break thing?" asked a concerned Avenna with a frown on her face.

Nowadays, I can't tell if people want to hear the actual truth or the short cliff note version just for casual formality. At some point i was past blaming myself for choosing to be vulnerable or feeling less of myself when we stepped out of the car then, we headed towards the one place that drinks taste like heaven in Vancouver a boba tea store with a delighted smile that light up my face and i immediately knew what i was ordering a mango & peach drink a added boba balls of lychee ice blend into it. Moreover, i wanted to pay for my drink except the fact that Ava had already beat me to it including claiming that she paid for it as a cheer-up gift from her during drinking our sweet tea, we taken a couple of pictures next we posted it online onto instagram hearing our phone vibrating from a thousand comments on our posts.

"Honestly, not great but I'm still working hard on my music project."I replied emotionally exhausted to Avenna.

Avenna was the type of girls who would rock any outfit especially wearing red made her look she ablaze fiery girl especially wearing her infamous red lipstick that all of the boys who would love to date yet me on the other hand, well i never had any admirers as we sit here waiting for the rest of the girls to come join us in the meantime, we spotted a karaoke machine in the establishment which only led to two ideas for her: one) sing a duet with her or two) she want me to go sing solo by myself Additionally, she started cheering my name out loud whilst she went to collect the microphone from a cashier guy when our friends Jessa, Natalia and Charlie walked over to us. I took the microphone as I slowly approached the stage now, i began scrolling through a list of songs eventually, i saw a very fitting song for this heartbreak season i was experience because it expressed my feeling right since it seems like he had chosen to exile out of my life.

There was a fine line between bittersweet pain of sadness and anger for him choosing to leave me before the song started. I shut my eyes, taking a deep wish that I could have been the one for him. Recently, i was tossing my pennies in the pool losing sight everything that i had manage to accomplished so many brilliant things in my life anyway, i don't know how other people talk about boys being their soulmate when Avenna, Jessa, Natalia and Charlie were my partners in crime and my platonic soulmates who i couldn't live without them nevertheless, the moral of the story was in order to heal i had to live. I should have seen the signs when he wrote about himself wanting to be my muse. I guess in every single way he didn't mean it literally but figuratively making me face these difficult emotions.

"What was it your plan to encourage me to sing in front of an audience?"I asked Avenna confusedly. All my friends pulled me into a tight bear hug after they were cheering my names and thanked them for being there for me. "I love you guys so much." i felt my tears pouring down my face like this felt so real also knowing that being with him was such a flight risk as it felt as if my heart was being ripped into two.

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