Red Eyes (Uta Fan Fiction)

Chapter 1

Edited

"Your coffee, ma'am," the waitress puts down my coffee on the small round table I was sitting at. I thanked her with a timid smile and turned towards the window as my mind began it's usual cycle.

This world we live in has become really dangerous. According to the norm every day roughly 150,000 people are supposed to die and 360,000 births should take place. But all of that gets interrupted by not just evil, no, but also humans themselves. We are the ones that act oblivious to everything going on around us just because it fits our personal schedule better. We don't do research, don't seek knowledge and when we get information served to us on a silver platter, we would rather have a wooden platter if it means that we'd have to invest less time and energy.

When accidents happen nobody bothers turning their head along with their eyes, nobody asks us if we're ok. We just get ignored and get treated like trash by our own kind.

The world is in my eyes colourless. Everyhting I see is in black and white. Happiness is an illusion to distract our brains from the things that really matter.

Pfft. And then humans blame ghouls for every horrid, monstreous thing they see on the news. Oh, how willingly blind our species is. There is so much more evil then we will ever be able to see or hear about.

I, myself, am completely human. Even though I am aware of the truths of our world, I am simply unable to do anything about it. Not as long as I'm alone.

I'm just trying to survive. That's what I'm always focused on, surviving. I might be alone, but I'm alive. 

My parents have never taught me anything. Not that they were cruel, on the contrary, they were my reason to stay alive. They simply weren't able to. They died in a car accident caused by a drunk driver. Thinking about that still makes my blood boil, even after 16 years. I'm 20 now. Losing your life or the life of a loved one due to someone else's irresponsibility is so incredibly cruel. 1 minute could've made a difference. The choices of that person could've made a difference. Even I, as a 5 year, if I had begged my parents to come home earlier could've made the difference. 

I blinked a few times, trying to stop the tears that were starting to form in my eyes before they could escape onto my cheeks. 

I was raised by my sister. She always told me to hold on. That life would be better. I just had to find my other half, as she would always call it. To this very day I feel like she believes in fairy tails too much. If fairy tails were real, my parents would be alive, we'd be a happy family and ghouls wouldn't exist. I always wondered why she was so naïve. So I'm supposed to believe I'm going to feel this soul connection with someone that will suddenly turn my life around for the better? That will protect me from the evil found around every corner of these dark grey streets, that will take care of me when I'm sick? 

Yeah, right. This is not a fairytale.

She lied to me. She just fed me all these lies in order for her to get rid of me and attend her parties. She never truly cared for me. Otherwise she wouldn't have left her little sister for a guy. Her one and only. Ugh. Makes me want to barf.

After I hit the 11 year old mark she started to neglect me. Every night she'd be absent from home. All her time was being spend on parties and alcohol and drugs. She just threw me aside like I was the one ruining her life. She would come back when the sky recieved a kiss by the sun, feed me the same lies, and end up vomiting and goin to sleep. This went on until she decided that I wasn't worth being looked after at all, that I was old enough. I was 13. 

I taught myself almost everything, like how to defend myself against both human and ghoul attacks, how to get my own food. I got a job, earned my own money and took care of my school. I followed fighting classes and fought with quinques.

I wanted to join CCG for a short while but then decided against it. I came to realize I didn't want to kill ghouls. Yet.

You see, ghouls are like us humans. Some of them are good kind and capable of emotions, just like us. What makes them so horrific however is their need for humans as their food.
We slaughter other animals for our nutrition, but we also have the capability to go vegetarian or even vegan. Them? They don't have an alternative. They either eat or starve to death.

On the other hand, both ghouls and humans are terribly annoying to deal with. Which is why I have yet to decide about applying for a job at CCG.

The sky darkened and the sun said her goodbye as sorrowful clouds were pushing her down, letting me know it was going to rain soon. I put some money on the table and stood up, offering a nod in return to the greyed owner as the little bell of the front door rang, signaling my leave from Anteiku.

I needed to buy a new dagger and go home before it got too late. I could also get some pepper spray, you know, for defence against humans. Since we're weak like that.

I pat my pocket to confirm I had enough money for my next stop as the honking of cars was disrupted by a loud explosion from the sky, followed by blindingly white light that made everything seem like it was covered in daylight for just a split second. The sound of traffic was getting mostly drowned out by the agressive sounds of the angry rain. 

I didn't mind it though, I found the pitter patter, although agressive, quite relaxing.

The shop wasn't far from where I found myself so I arrived in a few minutes. The thing about the weapons from this particular shop was that they were made from reused quinques material. As always the two males behind the counter stared at me from the moment they noticed my petite figure standing inside the store. Since the first day I set foot inside this store these two can't believe that I bought all the weapons for myself. 

"Did daddy send you to buy him a new weapon to play with, or did he give you some extra allowence to buy yourself some pepper spray?" Both of them started chuckling at the mocking comment of the blonde Johnny Bravo looking fellow. 

"Less hairspray would do you well, Bravo,'' I completely ignored his first comment. 

''Haha, funny. What is it you want? We're closing in a minute.''

I quickly bought my dagger and spray without dragging on the exhange for longer then needed and exited with the black plastic bag in my hand. This time the rain hit my face harsher then before and prevented me from looking up for too long. I closed my eyes. The heavy rain looked and sounded eerie but in reality is harmless.

Since I wasn't ready to go home and face reality yet, I kept strolling alongside the road until I found a soaked bench. I sat down on it and squirmed a bit once I made contact with the wet, cold surface.

I took deep breaths and tightened my grip on the bag.

You just have to find your one and only.  I snorted. He'll be your addicton, Sarah. The world will be so much brighter in your eyes. When he holds you, you'll never want him to let go, you'll be safe.

A tear escaped my eye and slowly rolled down my cheek.

As much as I wanted to deny it, I couldn't help but feel.

I am lonely and alone and if what my sister said was indeed true.. I wouldn't mind some company. 

I whipped my head up when I felt someone's gaze on me. After looking around frantically my eyes caught a tall black silhouette on top of the building to my left. I could tell it was facing me, because of two red glowing dots which I knew were the eyes. Red eyes. A ghoul. And it was staring at me.

Upon realizing this my heart started hammering in my chest. My breathing quickened. What would normally rile me up to fight struck fear into my body. Maybe it was because it was staring at me before I had time to look back at it. Maybe it was the rain impairing my sight slightly. Maybe it was because all I could tell clearly were the positions of the eyes. No matter what the reason was, this feeling was telling me to get to safety.

Maybe it's time to go home.