12 Make sh*t happen

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The pounding in my head returns with a vengeance as I attempt to eat some breakfast, this isn't even enjoyable, the tea just tastes like hot water and the toast like cardboard. Blurgh. I force myself to have a little more anyways, just so I won't have an empty stomach.


The boys chatter away about everything they've been doing whilst I've been asleep, they seem more relaxed now. I stretch out a little on the bed, my muscles sore. I need a walk, some fresh air. I wonder if any of the women faced any back lash yesterday, I hope not. Putting the tea down, I slowly manouvre myself out of the bed, taking things really, really easy.


Apparently, this was still too fast as I immediately feel dizzy. Holding onto the bed for dear life I steady myself waiting for the world to stop spinning. Do I risk getting up? Well, it all depends on how much I want fresh air.Which, is very much so. Snail's pace, I lift myself off the duvet into a standing position and hold myself there, un moving.


I find I can't move beyond this, my head still throbbing and the dizziness does not want to let up. Gently, as not to agitate my body any further I lay back in bed again, my stomach churning. I drown out the boys chatter as I fall asleep again.


This time, when I awake everything is black, the kids are snuggled beside me in bed with no sign of Theo, even though I'm in his bed. I'm grateful to whoever has looked after my kids today. Slowly, as to avoid waking the troll that resides in my head whose only joy in life is to pound my skull,I sit up.


I'm pleasantly surprised to find I no longer feel as groggy or dizzy as before. I slip out of bed with ease, even happier that my head seems okay too.I fumble my way to the bathroom, regretting not switching my torch on but soon enough feel the familiar click of the switch. The light assaults my eyes as black dots form in front of my vision, I take a moment to re-orienteer myself then immediately flinch at the image before me.


My hair disheveled beyond belief, under eye bags so large I'd have to pay extra if I was boarding a plane, my eyes bloodshot and my face etched with creases from the sheets.


After splashing water on my face and brushing my teeth, I make my way downstairs, hoping but not really giving a damn either way if anyone else was down there too. I take the stairs one at a time, hearing out for signs of life down below, I'm happy nobodies there with my current appearance and mood I didn't want to deal with anyone.


I'm not entirely sure why I'm going down anyway, I'm not hungry, or particularly thirsty I just want to go. Hearing nothing, I take the last few steps into the kitchen and walk straight to the fridge a glass of cold orange juice nestling in my hands. I don't mind that it's too cold, that its making me want to rub my hands together for warmth.


I like that, I like that its making me feel something beyond pain and dizziness. After awhile, I pry my fingers off the glass and stretch my hands, loving the way my muscles felt stretched.


"Luna?" A soft voice snaps me back to reality.


"Yes?" I reply taking my time to look up to her.


"Are you okay?"

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