Follow The Music

Chapter 20: His Legacy

I still had the keys to Cole's apartment so I got in my car and drove over there. Zoe asked if I wanted her to come with me but I declined her offer. I felt like it was something I needed to do on my own.

I pulled up in front of his place and started walking to his apartment. I unlocked the door and stepped inside. I looked around for him as though he would suddenly appear again and that what had happened within the last two days were all a nightmare. I wanted to wake up and see him here with me. I walked over to his desk and picked up the piece of paper with lyrics written on it. I read them and smiled.

"Well he had finally returned to himself. I only wish I could have been there to see it before he left."

I then remembered that whenever Cole wrote a new song, he'd do a rough recording of it on his computer. I turned on his computer on the desk and clicked play on the video called Emma's song.

"So this song is for Emma. Here it is..." He said before he started strumming his guitar.

I smiled as I had finally gotten the chance to see him again. He looked so real on the screen. I reached out to touch his cheek but was sad when I realised he wasn't actually here.

"My head is haunting me
And my heart feels like a ghost
I need to feel something
Cause I'm still so far from home
Cross your heart and hope to die
Promise me you'll never leave my side.

Show me what I can't see
When the spark in my eyes is gone.
You've got me on my knees.
I'm your one man cult.
Cross my heart and hope to die
Promise you I'll never leave your side.

Cause I'm telling you
You're all I need.
I promise you
You're all I see.
Cause I'm telling you
You're all I need.
I'll never leave.

So you can drag me through hell
If it meant I could hold your hand.
I will follow you.
Cause I'm under your spell
And you can throw me to the flames.
I will follow you.
I will follow you.

Come sink into me and
Let me breathe you in.
I'll be your gravity.
You be my oxygen.
So dig two graves cause when you die,
I swear I'll be leaving by your side.

So you can drag me through hell
If it meant I could hold your hand.
I will follow you.
Cause I'm under your spell
And you can throw me to the flames.

I will follow you.
I will follow you.
I will follow you
I will follow you
So you can drag me through hell
If it meant I could hold your hand.
I will follow you.
Cause I'm under your spell
And you can throw me to the flames.
I will follow you.
I will follow you."

Cole smiled right after the song finished. "I hope she'll like it when I play it for her. I can't wait." Then the video ended.

I loved the song it made me all happy and sad at the same time. I had no idea he cared for me that much.

* * * *

I couldn't turn on the TV. I couldn't go online. Because news of Cole's death was everywhere. But as the days passed, the band's manager talked me into speaking at a press release about Cole and future plans with the band. So here I am, called to stand in front of the press. I step up and begin speaking. "So as of late, most of you have probably heard of what happened with Cole. I still love him and will always miss him which I'm sure many of his fans feel the same way." My voice began to crack so I quickly cleared my throat. "It's very hard for me to come up here and talk to you all about it. It was a terrible accident and I wish nobody would have to endure losing someone through an accidental death. It's hard...especially when you can't blame anyone. But I guess people leaving this earth in any matter is really hard no matter what."

I'm starting to wish I had prepared a speech.

"Anyone have any questions?"

A guy at the front took charge. "So when's the funeral and will the public be allowed to be there?"

"The funeral is coming soon and it will be a private ceremony. But there will be a service for fans. Anyone else?"

"Do you have any plans with your band?"

"Well, actually we had found a new guitarist about a week ago. So we should be ready to start recording."

"And who is this new guitarist?"

I looked behind me to my manager and he nodded. I then faced everyone else again. "Our new guitarist is the very talented River Evans. We are all very excited to be working with him. And I just know we're going to be creating some great music together."

The crowd of journalists erupted into excitement and began writing it down. Then they all were asking so many different questions at the one time and I couldn't keep up with what they were asking, until one question was voiced very clearly. "What was the last thing you said to him?"

The realisation hit me like an endless force of a million darts to my body. Even in our last moments, i was truely a bitch. I looked behind me to my manager and he must have seen it in my face, the pain, the horror.

My manager stepped forward and said; "Thank you. That is enough questions for now." Then Joel guided me away from the crowd and into the car. "You did good."

I sighed. "Thanks." There was a long silence between us as the car drove on back to my apartment. It seemed like Joel didn't know what to say to me and my mind was elsewhere. "When do we start writing for the new album again?" I suddenly asked, shattering the glass of silence between us.

"The others are waiting for the right time."

"And when is the right time?"

Joel hesitated. "They wanted to give you time to grieve."

"I've had plenty of time. It's not like we were together in a relationship when he died. I shouldn't have been given time to grieve. I need to be doing my job. I need to write."

"They're all just concerned for you."

I ignored his words and asked. "Can you book a studio the day after the funeral?"

"I'll make it happen."

"Good. I'll have some stuff written up by then."

"Em, you don't have to get right back into work. I'm sure everyone will understand completely if you gave yourself some time-"

"I'm fine. Things just need to go back to the way there were. I need normalcy."

* * * *

A/N: song used in this chapter is called 'Follow You' by Bring Me The Horizon