Chapter Thirty-Four: Hymenally Challenged

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"I still haven't faced him," my mother admitted after she had ditched the junk food and made herself a cup of tea.

You would think that just because you have a stable job, married twice, gave birth and raised a child, and is a proper adult already, you would stop all these weeping moments of female weakness where you just have to resort to crappy processed food and horribly made chick flicks to make yourself better.

Spoiler alert, you'll still continue that never-ending routine of self-pity.

"I would love to nag you just like the many times you've done to me of stop being a coward, but I guess you already know that," I muttered as I scraped more of the facial mask from the container before applying it on my skin, "This would have been prevented if you just listened to me."

She didn't find my lighthearted remarks funny at all as she only shot me a dirty look in response. Holding back the huge urge to say 'I told you so,' I opted to offer her a face mask and she slumped.

We've managed to clear out the whole coffee table of her trash and I set up a mirror here and the rest of my skincare routine. Just because my mom's having a crisis doesn't mean my gorgeous skin should suffer, I've been holding back with the treatments because I've been staying over at Gray's so it deserves a bit of pampering.

Do you know how risky it is to continuously wear make-up without proper moisturization?

Let me tell you, you might break out everywhere. Not only was it difficult to cover up, but you have to consider that I detest any kind of flaw on my skin.

Wait, what were we talking about again?

"You know, I should stop moping around," she declared, shooting up from her spot as she started pacing back and forth, "If he thinks that he can get away with doing that to me then he's wrong!"

Glancing up, I muttered, "Yeah," absentmindedly as I shook the bottle of nail polish. If I just picture her to be about twenty years or so younger, I would have seen a mirror image of myself.

"You should have seen me when I was your age," she muttered, placing her hands on her hips, "Nothing could cross me."

I paused from uncapping the bottle when I suddenly remembered the piece of information my dad shared to me during my existential crisis, "Hold on, why didn't you tell me that you were a cheerleader?"

She paused from her steps as she turned to me, "How did you know?"

"Dad," I replied simply, screwing the cap again before placing it on the coffee table, "He told me the whole thing – starting when you and him coming from different social groups to comforting you when you were down."

Letting out a deep sigh, she settled back down on the couch, "I knew he would bring it up someday."

"Is that why you preferred Evan instead of Gray?"

She nodded in response, reaching out for her mug once again, "Your father was my knight in shining armor back then."

"A knight in shining armor that you threw to the side," I spat unintentionally. I was trying to be civil, I really was, but it proved to be a difficult task when you're still bitter about one single fact.

A fact that my mother cheated on my father.

She drew her bottom lip in-between her teeth as she stared down on her beverage. The more I observe, the more I come to realize that I share a lot of my habits with mom and one of the biggest examples is the lip biting.

Well, I spent nine months in her and she was the one who raised me so...

"What you may or may not know is that even though I loved him so much, there was someone I love more," she stated after she found the words to explain her thoughts, "I handled things the wrong way, but I think it was better that we separated instead of the both of us living with the knowledge that our relationship was half-hearted."

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