TALK TO ME ¯ᶠʳᵉʳᵃʳᵈ

-ˏˋｎｉｎｅｔｅｅｎ：ｂｒｏｋｅｎˊˎ-

Gerard didn't really give me time to answer. He dropped the scissors on the bed and ran over to me, taking both my hands in his and examining my wrists. He sighed in relief when he didn't see any new scars.

"Frankie, why were they there?"

I sighed and went over to the bed, phone in hand. Gerard sat next to me, moving the scissors onto the nightstand, and waited patiently for me to write my reply.

"I felt alone while you were gone," was what I wrote and showed Gerard.

"So the first thing you thought to do was cut?" he asked. It seemed insulting at first, but I could tell he was just trying to understand.

I wrote, "That's the first thing I would always do. When things go wrong, that's what was there."

"What got you to stop yourself?" he asked.

I typed, "You. I figured if you came back I wanted you to see that I held up pretty well."

Gerard laughed a little. "Oh you definitely held up well. You've gotten stronger, so much stronger, and I'm happy that you have because that's what I need and that's what you need. I don't want you to think you have to go back to doing that."

I looked down at my wrists, at the old scars that covered them. Every single moment of sadness was a temptation to cut again. I wished I could just stop wanting it, but I couldn't help it. Even when things were going great, I almost missed it. I shook the thoughts away and wrote Gerard another text.

"I don't want to, but I do. I did it for so long that I can't really just get over it like that. I mean I can stop myself, but that doesn't mean I'm not gonna want it or be tempted to do it."

"I understand," Gerard sighed, "it really is just like an addiction. You want to stop but your body still wants it." I nodded, so relieved that he understood me. "We'll help each other then. I replace the cutting, you replace the drugs."

I couldn't help but grin at this idea. I felt equal to Gerard, like we were completely leveled. Before, I felt like I couldn't do for Gerard what he did for me, but we were helping each other now in the same exact way.

"Um, Frankie, c-can I kiss you?" Gerard asked, actually looking hesitant and nervous. I smiled at how adorable he looked when he wasn't sure of himself.

I nodded and he quickly leaned forward and pressed his lips to mine. I could tell he was a bit more hesitant than he usually was, so I brought one hand up to the back of his head, tangling my fingers into his hair and pushed his face closer to me, forcing him to put more pressure into the kiss. He got more comfortable and immediately brought one hand up to cup my neck as he pushed closer to me until I was laying down on the bed and he hovered over me, his body just inches from mine. My body tingled at his body heat being so close to me. I wanted him closer.

He ran his tongue along my bottom lip, lingering around my lip ring, causing a warm sensation to flood throughout my body. I welcomed his tongue into my mouth and he explored it hastily, lust behind his every move. I brought a hand up to his back and pressed so that he collapsed on top of me. He gasped, not wanting to crush me, but I let him know I was alright with it by holding him in place with both hands.

He put his focus back into the kiss, running his tongue along mine and I just allowed him to do as he pleased, my body shivering from every single thing he did. He shifted his body a bit, I assumed trying to get comfortable, until I realized he was trying to align our hips together and-fuck, when he did, I threw my head back, breaking the kiss. The friction sent an endless chain of shivers throughout my body and I just dug my nails into the back of Gerard's shirt. He let out a small moan before finding a new place for his lips.