TALK TO ME ¯ᶠʳᵉʳᵃʳᵈ

-ˏˋｔｗｅｎｔｙ ｔｈｒｅｅ：ｋｅｅｐｉｎｇ ｉｔ ｔｏｇｅｔｈｅｒˊˎ-

"Frankie, don't leave me."

That was the whimper that came out of Gerard's lips every single night. He had been doing great and resisting way more than I thought he could. But he had the worst cravings at night. Neither of us had been getting much sleep because of this. He'd developed this paranoia that I would just get up and leave him. I would just comfort him, sometimes play the guitar, and help him get back to sleep.

He was always having nightmares, though. I'd wake up to him squirming around in his sleep before he'd scream and wake up. He would never tell me what the nightmares were, because he thought they were too horrible to tell. I didn't pressure him, so I just let it be.

Gerard had wanted to keep these night terrors a secret from Mikey, but I convinced him not to. I would be leaving on the weekend and not be able to spend the night with him, so Mikey had to know so that he could comfort him in my place. I hated the thought of leaving Gerard, especially when he was like this.

At around dawn on Friday, he made having to leave even harder. I woke up just to go use the bathroom. When I came back, Gerard was sitting up in bed. He had his knees hugged to his chest and his head down. I slowly walked over and placed a gentle hand on his shoulder. His head snapped up and his eyes were wide and tear filled. The sight broke my heart.

"Frankie," he whimpered, "you're ok? You're ok..."

I nodded quickly and crawled onto the bed next to him to wrap a comforting arm around him. I could never get used to seeing him so broken, but I kept a strong supporting front. I gently pressed his chest to lay him down, and I was shocked to feel how fast his heart was beating beneath my touch. It felt about ready to beat right out of his chest and land in my hands. His hands were trembling as he brought them up to hold me. I laid down next to him so that he could hold me close.

I had my head on his shoulder and kept pressing small innocent kisses to his cheek, and jaw, and neck. His skin felt hot and there was a thin sheen of sweat, but I didn't mind. I just wanted him to calm down. His body was obviously tense and his arms were wrapped tightly around my body. If he didn't feel so weak and fragile, I would have been scared he'd break me.

"I-I thought," he whimpered, and I just continued petting his hair and kissing him gently. "I thought something happened to you. That you left. That you left me."

I shook my head and tried to reach for my cell phone that was on the nightstand, but Gerard's grip wouldn't budge.

"It's ok," he said, his voice barely above a whisper. "You don't have to say anything. Just please stay next to me."

I sighed and nodded, leaning up just a bit to peck his lips. They were trembling as well, but he kissed me back gently. I rested my head on his shoulder and he had his chin on the top of my head. I kept a hand placed on his chest, feeling his heart beat slow down and soften until it was back to its normal pace. His breathing became heavy and I realized he was asleep. Once I knew he was asleep, I could sleep myself.

I was woken up what felt like just a couple hours later, by a pair of lips being pressed against my neck. They were moist and small and I shuddered, knowing exactly who they belonged to.

"You're awake," he whispered, his breath hitting the sensitive spot on my neck, and I nodded while another shiver ran through my body. He sat up and I missed the warmth of his chest pressed against my back.

"Sorry," he said, "about waking you in the middle of the night like that."

He always apologized every single morning for keeping me up and I would always respond by shaking my head. I sat up next to him and raised an eye brow, waiting for him to talk to me about what happened, why he got scared of me leaving.