Makeup Artist || MYG

Numb

It was the middle of the night. I had locked myself in Jimin and Jungkook's room the whole afternoon, only opening the door when one of them had to enter or leave. Yoongi tried to come in, but Jungkook (thankfully) told him that I needed some time. I just sat on the edge of my bed, motionless. I felt numb. I felt empty.

I was curled up in my bed as the moon rose high in the sky. It had taken so much time to fall into a decent slumber. Suddenly, I felt a gentle tap on my shoulder. I instantly awoke and looked up to see Jimin's face over mine.

"What?" I whispered, not wanting to wake Jungkook up.

"Yoongi's crying..." Jimin's voice cracked. My heart throbbed but it still felt cold.

"How do you know?" I asked tiredly as I sat up and gestured for Jimin to sit beside me.

"I went to check on him ten minutes ago. I was outside his door and heard him sobbing," Jimin said as he sat beside me. I nodded stiffly. I didn't know how to react. Should I be happy? Or was this just so Yoongi will have a second choice to go to when Chae Jin wasn't around?

"I'm scared..." Jimin whimpered.

"Why?" I asked curiously.

"He hasn't cried before. The last time he cried was when he was a child and when his Eomma-" Jimin stopped himself. I gulped. I knew exactly what happened.

"I think he's really sad," Jimin stated the obvious. I didn't know how to feel. I felt so numb and my heart was aching. I felt mentally drained and extremely tired. I didn't want to make any rash decisions when I wasn't thinking straight.

"Let's talk about it in the morning. I'm really tired," I mumbled. Jimin nodded understandingly and went back to his bed. I crawled back under my covers.

Yoongi's crying?

Stop Jae Rin. You don't even know why he's crying. Maybe he's crying about Chae Jin.

The negative thoughts were the horrible lullabies that lured me into a restless sleep.

***

I was frustrated when I woke up and realised that it was already morning. I changed into comfy clothes before plopping onto my bed. Jungkook was on his bed playing on his phone when Jimin walked out of the bathroom.

"Let's go for breakfast in the kitchen," Jimin chirped. Jungkook nodded happily before skipping off. I hesitated on the edge of my bed.

If I go out, Yoongi might talk to me. I don't want to talk to him.

"You coming?" Jimin asked as his hand rested on the doorknob. I shook my head and told him I wasn't hungry. He raised his eyebrows suspiciously but eventually left. I locked the door. I leaned against the head board of the bed and tucked my knees under my chin. I was getting bored.

I took out my laptop and decided to talk to Ji Yeon. I started the video call. The moment Ji Yeon's bright face graced my screen, my whole mood lifted.

"HEY GURL~" she yelled. I giggled. It hurt to giggle since I hadn't done so in quite a while.

"Hi," I said softly.

"Why do you sound like you just cried?!" Ji Yeon demanded.

"Yoongi..." was all I managed to say.

"Is anyone else listening to our conversation?" she asked. I shook my head.

"They take about an hour for breakfast," I explained. She nodded.

"So, what's going on?" she asked worriedly. I sighed as I buried my face in my hands. My elbows were propped on the laptop.

"This girl came. She's called Chae Jin. Apparently, from what I've understood so far, she was Yoongi's girlfriend. But she left. They never ended their relationship properly. And then I came along. And now she's back," I said. Ji Yeon stared thoughtfully.

"So what is your status with Yoongi?" she asked. I shrugged.

"He says I'm still his girlfriend. But I kind of broke up with him..." I whispered the last part.

"YOU DID WHAT?! WASN'T HE *THE ONE*?! WASN'T HE PERFECT?! WHY DID YOU-" Ji Yeon was cut off when I shushed her. I massaged my temples.

"I called you for advice not a scolding," I whined. She apologised before lowering her voice.

"Why did you break up with him?!" she hissed and tried not to scream.

"I think I'm just a distraction or second choice for him so he won't feel any pain when Chae Jin isn't around," I muttered.

"Wait. If you and him are... um... not together, where are you now?!" she demanded.

"In Jimin and Jungkook's room. I'm planning to move back to our house as soon as possible," I sighed.

"But you won't be safe there! Something might happen and no one will be there to save you!" she cried out.

"I know, I know. I'm still thinking this through," I mumbled.

"But... Do you still love him?" she asked me seriously.

"I don't know. I really don't know," I said honestly.

I talked to Ji Yeon for a while before ending the call. Soon, Jimin and Jungkook returned. Jimin shut the door while Jungkook came over to me with a plate of pancakes. They still had steam which meant that they were fresh and warm. Jungkook set the plate down on my bedside table as I looked at him curiously.

"Yoongi made this for you just now. He said that you should eat it or you'll get hungry," Jungkook informed me. My heart pounded a little quicker but I forced my head to nod. Jungkook returned to Jimin and they played games together.

I continued staring at the pancakes. My stomach was begging for a bite of Yoongi's amazing food, but my appetite was lost as soon as I thought of Yoongi. Because now, every time I thought of Yoongi, I thought of his girlfriend.