SIXTEEN

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"Knit, good woman! Knit! Knit!"

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"Knit, good woman! Knit! Knit!"

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"I don't know whether he was just testing me or just acting out, but my monkey is out of control." Out of context, Ross would be in some psychiatric ward. "He keeps erasing the messages on my machine. Supposedly by accident."

"Oh. Yeah, I've done that." Rachel nodded her head.

"And then, like, three days in a row, he got to the newspaper before I did and peed all over the crossword." We all made faces of disgust. "Hi, guys." We glanced back to see Joey and Chandler.

"Pheebs, guess who we saw today." Joey joined me at the small table.

"Fun! Okay. Liam Neeson." Phoebe started to guess. "Morley Safer?" Joey kept shaking his head at her. "The woman who cuts my hair?" She called out excitedly.

"This could be a really long game." Monica interrupted her from continuing.

"Your sister Ursula." Chandler answered.

"Oh. Really?" Phoebe leaned back against the couch and glanced down at the coffee table.

"She works over at that place..." Chandler trailed off, looking at Joey for help.

"Riff's. Yeah, I know." Phoebe finished for them.

"You do?" Chandler asked her. "She said you guys haven't talked in like years."

"Yeah." Phoebe nodded her head. "So, um, is she fat?"

"Not from where I was standing." Joey crossed his legs and smirked a little. Monica rubbed my back gently while I debated between throwing a cup of iced water or coffee at him.

"Where were you standing?" Phoebe looked up at my brother.

"You guys just don't get along, Pheebs?" Rachel inquired.

"Mostly just dumb sister stuff. Like everyone always thought of her as the pretty one, you know?" She sighed. "And she was the first one to start walking even though I did it later that same day. But to my parents, then it was like, 'Right. What else is new?'"

"I'm sorry, Pheebs. I've got to go. I've got Lamaze class." Ross quickly stood up.

"And I've got earth science, but I'll catch you in gym?" Chandler pointed at him.

"So is this just going to be with you and Carol?" Rachel glanced back at Ross.

"No. Susan's going to be there, too." Ross slumped over gloomily. "We've got dads, we've got lesbians—the whole parenting team."

"Well, isn't that going to be weird?" Rachel scrunched up her nose.

"It might have been at first, but by now, I'm comfortable with the whole situation." He put a coat on, but it wasn't his.

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