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"If I'm going down, I'm taking everybody with me."
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"This is unbelievable, Pheebs. How can you be married?" Joey asked her, stealing a spoonful of my ice cream sundae.
"Well, I'm not married married, you know?" Phoebe was pacing by the dining table. "He was just a friend, and he's gay, and he was from Canada, and he needed a green card." She replied.
"I can't believe you married Duncan. How could you not tell me?" Monica came over to stand next to her. "We lived together. We told each other everything."
"I'm sorry, Monica, but I knew if I told you, you'd get really judgmental, you would not have approved." Phoebe took her friend's hands into hers.
"Of course I wouldn't approve. I mean, you were totally in love with this guy, who—hello—was gay. I mean, what the hell were you thinking?" Monica nudged Phoebe's arm.
"See? And you thought she'd be judgmental." Ross leaned back in his seat and said sarcastically.
"Okay, I wasn't 'in love' with him, and I was just helping out a friend." She defended herself.
"Please." Monica scoffed. "When he left town, you stayed in your pajamas for a month. And I saw you eat a cheeseburger." The rest of us gasped in shock. "Well? Didn't you?"
"I might have." Phoebe poured herself another cup of tea.
"Well, I am actually really proud of you, Pheebs. It takes guts to put aside your love for someone to be friends and do something that extraordinary." I gave her a side hug.
"Thanks, Suparna." She smiled at me gratefully.
"It's just...I still can't believe you didn't even tell me." Monica continued to complain.
"Come on. Like you tell me everything?" Phoebe turned to her.
"Alright, what have I not told you?" Monica challenged Pheebs.
"Oh, I don't know. Um, how about the fact that the underwear out there on the telephone pole is yours from when you were having sex with Fun Bobby out on the terrace!" Phoebe exposed her.
"What?" We all yelled, running over to the window to take a look at her underwear.
"Wait a minute! Who told you?" Chandler tried to hide my face, but Monica quickly realized. "You are so dead meat." She pointed a finger at him and squinted her eyes.
"I didn't know it was a big deal." My brother tried to push her finger down.
"Oh, it's not big at all." She brushed his shoulder. "You know, kind of the same lines as, say, I don't know, having a third nipple!" We ran over to her and my brother.
"You have a third nipple?" Phoebe exclaimed.
"You bitch." Chandler didn't take his eyes off of Monica.
