Evol

chapter twenty-one

author's note -

julian's not used to being friend-zoned, huh?

have a beautiful day

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Wednesday 12th June, 2019

I sighed, completely fazed out of the lunchtime conversation.

Julian had a hidden talent. He could make every minute last a lifetime.

I'd thought, when he stormed off on Tuesday afternoon, it was just one of his moods. But things weren't the same today.

My eyes found him - by themselves - too often. Every time, he was looking the other way. I couldn't help but feel it was deliberate. My heart was heavy, dragging somewhere around my feet. Worse, I had a horrible feeling, like I'd done something wrong.

This wasn't like last week. Julian wasn't being a dick to me. . . He wasn't being anything. Like we didn't even know each other.

Somehow, I preferred him as a bastard. At least he spoke to me.

I shook my head quickly. That was absurd.

"Are you okay?" Amy asked, looking at me.

I flushed, leaning back on the grass. "I'm fine."

"Why'd you shake your head?" Brendan asked, sitting next to me.

"Headache," I mumbled. "What kind of film are we watching on Saturday?" I asked.

Amy flashed a smile. "A romance!"

My body tensed. Really? Did I really have to watch two people fall in love happily? Two people that were perfect for each other? I looked up at the cloudless blue sky. Maybe this was what I needed. To realise what I felt was stupid, to repress it until it went away.

Jordan groaned. "A romance? Really, Amy?"

"It's not just a romance. . ." She stuck out her bottom lip. "It's got action, too! Guns and things, for you idiot boys."

"Hey," I called her out. "I like guns, too. This is a--"

"Feminist issue," Jordan and Brendan finished for me, rolling their eyes.

I smiled, happy, and lay back on the grass. "Exactly!"

"Sounds good," Holly chewed on a sweet.

Although I wasn't feeling too great about the movie, I knew it would do me good to go out with my friends. Take my mind off everything going on, forget memories about blue clubs and Julian's fingers around mine and stupid things that played in my head.

Brendan nudged me, "you going to get a lift this time?"

I shook my head at him. "I'll just take my car."

Brendan frowned, "seriously? We'll just give you a lift."

I sat up hastily, rubbing my eyes. "Don't waste fuel on me. It's so expensive these days."

Brendan leaned an arm on my knee. Pain spiked down my shin, but I gritted my teeth and didn't let it show.

"Expensive? You should have money in the bank!"

"Why?" I forced out.

"Your tutoring? Julian still turns up, doesn't he?"

I sighed. "Hopefully."

I worried about the next day at least once every five minutes. I hoped he would just let me have an hour and then leave. Even though he was being cold, I found myself wanting to see him.