Evol

chapter thirty-five

Monday 31st June, 2019

It still hurt.

I sat in a circle with my friends at lunch, chatted, acted like I didn't feel heavy.

My phone vibrated - a text from Carter: Eat something.

I smiled, turned around to see that group behind me, sprawled out on the grass. Carefully, I avoided looking at Julian completely, and grinned at Carter instead.

I text back: ham sandwiches seem gross today.

I heard a faint chuckle as he read it, and then I received: eat it and I'll let you give me a lift in the beacon today.

I sent: deal.

+++

Tuesday 1st July, 2019

He glowered at me in the corridor - it was the first time I'd actually looked at him in over a week. Curls fell into his eyes, lessoning the poison in his stare.

It still felt like a punch in the stomach.

+++

Wednesday 2nd July, 2019

Brendan stopped asking me if there was something wrong, even though the dark circles under my eyes grew more pronounced every day.

My parents stopped me on my way out to meet Carter.

Mum spoke up, her beady eyes trained on me. "Where are you going?"

"To meet a friend," I said, eager to bolt. Training with Carter had become the only bearable part of the day, the only part where I didn't feel like I was drowning.

"Every night?" Dad peered at the room behind the couch.

"We work out!" I tried to be enthusiastic. "I'm leading a healthy lifestyle."

"Okay. . ." They said, and let me go.

+++

Thursday 3rd July, 2019

I was throwing punches into Carter's hands, swinging from side to side, breaking a sweat, when Carter opened his mouth, hesitated, and closed it again.

"What?" I gasped, breathless.

"Nothing." He said quickly. "Bend your knees more."

I bent them, eyeing him warily as I carried on; it was so quiet in the woods that my breaths were almost awkwardly loud.

"Stop distracting me," I mumbled. "What did you want to say?"

"Nothing."

I straightened up, raising my eyebrows. Me and Carter had grown quite close over the past week, so I felt perfectly justified in demanding an answer from him. "Come on, it's me. What is it?"

Carter's ice blue eyes were wide, watching me before he groaned. "You punch, I'll talk."

"Deal," I said, balling my hands into fists.

His blond hair fell in his eyes, and I flicked it back for him; Carter didn't move a muscle.

"What?" I said after a moment. "Go on."

"Oh. . ." He shook his head. "Well. . . Julian asked where I was going every day after school."

My stomach twisted at the sound of his name, and I froze where I stood. "W-what?"

"I know," Carter muttered. "He's a nosey bastard."

My brain was working to digest what he'd just said. I'd noticed Julian a couple of times around school in the past week, never looking at me. I'd thought he'd moved on - on to the next bitch.