Hunter Williams' Taboo Adventure

Twenty-Seventh Chapter

❝If you want to support others you have to stay upright yourself.❞

- Peter Hoeg

[ H U N T E R   W I L L I A M S ]

The last few weeks have been extremely difficult, to say the least. Blake had been hospitalized for over two weeks at this point, diagnosed with a severe case of pneumonia of all things. He was only recently transferred to a hospital near home because the hospital staff in Scotland decided to ignore their patient's requests.

I had spent as much time as I could by his side, constantly reassuring and supporting him throughout his illness and to my relief - he was getting released today.

It was already New Year's eve, twenty-nineteen was coming to an abrupt end, it was almost scary how fast time flew by.

I had been trying my absolute best to stay happy and focused by Blake's side, ignoring the fact that I had no one to go back to at home or to spend Christmas with. This time of the year was extremely difficult for me because I truly envied the people who had stable, loving families to go back to. I wished to have what they did, but I knew I never would.

As volatile as my mental health had been, I managed to persevere and right now, I was on the edge of my seat because Blake was going home tonight.

During the last couple of weeks, I gave the conversation between Blake and me in the ski resort infirmary a second thought. 

I was overall happy to know more about Blake. I think him showing vulnerability and sharing a dark part of his life with me opened up an opportunity for us to become even closer as friends. Sure as hell didn't deter me from having strong feelings towards him either.

In these kinds of situations, having and dealing with anxiety was the worst - when overthinking is your only way of thinking, it is almost impossible the decipher motives. A part of me hoped that he engaged in such an intimate conversation with me because there was a chance for us to be something more - but I think that was just me delusionally spiralling out of touch.

Yes. After everything that happened, I was still, if not more, madly in love with Blake Carter, my fucking English teacher.

However, this time I wasn't trying to push those feelings out of my head, I wasn't trying to run away from them or force myself to look at other people, I was living with it - with the intent to love him unconditionally till I can't any longer.