This Summer (DMBB Spin-off)

Chapter 4: I've Got You

"I wanna hide the truth
I wanna shelter you
But with the beast inside
There's nowhere we can hide."

Song: Demons ~ Imagine Dragons

***

4. I've Got You

"Shayley?" Shawn called.

I turned to face him. "Hm?"

"Shayley," he began. "You don't need to pretend with me. I know, remember?"

Yes, unfortunately.

"Shawn, I'm fine," I told him.

"Then rehab, why did you stop going?"

Because I didn't need to feel like the most fragile thing in the world that could break any second.

"Because I didn't need it anymore," I answered. "Seriously Shawn, I'm not your responsibility, so stop trying to fix me."

Why did he even care? Okay that was a stupid question. He was my friend, and Khalan's worries had probably become a bottomless abyss.

"You're going down a dangerous road," he told me. "I'm just worried, that's all."

I rolled my eyes. "I'm not going down any road Shawn. Thank you for being a good friend, but I promise, I am fine."

He just nodded. "Okay, I'll take your word for it."

I sighed. "Thank you."

I didn't know if he was being truthful or not but that was the answer I needed to hear.

Jacob walked in. "Shawn, certain people want their drinks. What's keeping you?"

Join the party.

"Yeah," Shawn said. "I'm coming."

He walked over to the fridge and pulled out three cans of root beer before walking out.

I stayed silent and Jacob looked at me. "You okay Shayley? You walked out of there pretty fast."

I'm fine really, I just had to fight off an oncoming anxiety attack, no biggie.

I kept my sarcasm to myself and just nodded. "I just got a little dizzy that's all."

"You could always go lie down or something," he suggested.

I shook my head. "That won't be necessary. I'm fine, really."

He studied me for a few seconds and then nodded slowly. "Okay then. Let's head back out then?"

"Yeah," I said softly and followed him.

I don't know what was wrong with me. In my head there was a voice screaming at me to say how I really felt on the inside but whenever I opened my mouth the exact opposite came out.

You're really full of shit Shayley Folton.

********

I woke up early the next morning, but I had no motivation or whatsoever to get out of bed. I looked at Renée and saw her peacefully asleep on her bed, her back facing me. Sighing, I took everything I had in me and sat up, getting up afterwards. I stuck my hand under the mattress and pulled out my bag, putting an Adderall pill in my mouth. It was my go-to whenever I felt I needed some energy to get me through the day, or most of it.

A lot of times I didn't have the energy to do anything.

Renée's back was still turned, so I knew she didn't see anything. I swallowed it with the help of water from a bottle I kept on the nightstand. I went into the bathroom and freshened up, opening the door and walking out quietly so I wouldn't wake her. It looked like no one was awake. Well, until I walked into the kitchen.