This Summer (DMBB Spin-off)

Chapter 25: Liam Has A Nice Ass...Part Two

"Was there something I could've said to make your heart beat better?
If only I'd have known you had a storm to weather."

Song: Before You Go ~ Lewis Capaldi

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25. Liam Has A Nice Ass...Part Two

For the next couple of days I wasn't left alone for even a second.

Unless I had to go to the bathroom of course.

I know what everyone feared. That if I were alone I'd hurt myself again or at least try. But I wouldn't. I wanted them to know that I wouldn't, but I didn't blame anyone for worrying. My actions in the past hadn't exactly helped me establish a high level of trust with anyone.

I wouldn't trust myself either.

For the next couple of days, I also spent a lot of my time thinking to myself and asking myself questions.

Questions about Cameron.

What were the signs? How could I have missed them?

Was there something I could have said? Something I could have done? Was there anything on earth that I could have done to ease his pain?

"I'll be fine Shayley, choose him. He'll be there for you...always..."

"Let me go..."

"The two of us together would only be a catastrophe..."

"We need each other, but not in the way you think we do..."

"Just because I carry my problems well doesn't mean that they aren't heavy..."

Those were the signs weren't they? If only I had paid more attention. If only I'd taken what he said a little more seriously. Maybe then he'd be here. He didn't have what I have...an entire army of people looking out for him. He had me, and I let him down.

"Come find me...you know where I'll be..."

Well obviously I had no fucking clue.

"Ehem?"

I snapped out of my thoughts and remembered that Liam was in front of me.

"Okay, let you stare into space quite long enough," he chuckled. "Your turn, but first...behold."

I looked down at the Scrabble board and rose an eyebrow at the words he had just formed. "Really?"

"I present to you, Liam Has A Nice Ass..Part Two," he said.

"You're really proud of your ass huh?" I chuckled, taking my turn.

He got up and turned around. "Well I mean...have you seen this masterpiece?"

"It's one of a kind," I said, hyping him up.

He grinned. "Thank you, my mom made it."

He sat back down and took his turn when I finished mine. I ran my thumb over my wrist. My cuts had healed, but I still kept covering them with band-aids. I didn't want to look at them. I didn't want to be reminded of how weak I actually was.

"Shayley?" Liam called, moving the tiles around.

"Hm?" I answered.

"Are you okay?"

It had been a while since anybody had actually asked me that. I think they thought it would just make me mad. In their defense I always hated being asked that. I t just meant I'd have to lie. This time though, I wanted to tell the truth.