This Summer (DMBB Spin-off)

Chapter 24: We're Too Young To Be This Sad

"I will fight
I will fight for you
I always do until my heart
Is black and blue."

Song: Don't Give Up On Me ~ Andy Grammer

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24. We're Too Young To Be This Sad

Jacob's POV

I sighed to myself before brushing on of the horses' mane. My heart had broken so many times already, and when I found Shayley on the floor the previous night, my heart broke again.

I didn't know what to do. She was breaking, and every time I held her I could feel her crumble just a little more.

I wanted to make it better. I wanted to take away her hurt. I wanted to put her back together.

But I didn't know how.

I was way out of my element here. How was I supposed to help her with something as complicated as grief?

The door to the stable opened, and I turned to take a look.

"You've been in here all day mate," Shawn said.

I kept brushing. "Yeah well..."

"How are you?"

I shrugged. "Fine."

"Don't bullshit me Jacob," he said, sitting on one of the haystacks. "We both know you're not okay."

"What the fuck do you expect me to say Shawn?" I asked him. "I'm not the one scrambling to pick up whatever pieces that are left of me."

"She likes you," he said, and I gripped the brush in my hand a little tighter. "I see it."

"She's also mourning and I can't take advantage of that," I remarked.

And she likes Cameron, not me.

"I know mate," he said. "And I just thought that this might remind you of-"

"I know what you think," I interrupted so that he didn't finish his sentence.

He nodded. "Look, you were always the most level-headed of all of us. God knows you've saved my ass more times than I can count. So just...let me help you out this time okay? You can trust me."

I sighed. "I...I don't know if I can do it. I can't save her Shawn."

"No one's asking you to," he said. "But she's giving up on herself, and the last thing she needs is for you to give up on her too."

I chuckled sourly, going to take a seat beside him. "This is all so fucked up man. How the hell did we go from being in high school and having stupid fun at parties to this? How did we get here?"

Shawn shrugged. "I don't know, maybe because life finally decided to catch up with all of us? High school was probably the biggest facade ever. Everyone walks in there smiling when in actual fact we've all got shitty lives to deal with. And when we're finally out we realize that not everything can be hidden behind a fake smile."

I shook my head. "Why us?"

"I don't know man, I don't know."

But really, I did know. Nineteen or ninety, the world doesn't pick and choose which crucibles it gives us. Like I said, it rolls a pair of fucking dice, and lets us handle whatever comes out of that. And we were part of the select unlucky crew it decided to fuck over.

We just have to deal with it.

"We're too young to be this sad," I remarked.

Shawn sighed beside me. "That my friend, I do not disagree with."