My Mate is a Crazy Cat Lady {Namjoonxreader}

Chapter 48: Everyone is Mean

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Granny wakes us up at the asscrack of dawn.

Over the months that she's been staying with us, I've yet to determine whether this is an intentional act or not. She's mostly deaf without her hearing aids, so really there's no way for her to know how loud she is. On the other hand, she's still a human that should be able to discern these things.

Like, she should know from all the time she had fully functioning ears that slamming doors and loudly passing gas would ultimately lead to our sleep being interrupted.

Eun-ji is hogging a good portion of the queen size bed we share, curled into my side and generating enough body heat to rival that of the fires of Mount Doom. It's so warm and comfortable that strangely, I don't care that she's pushed me into one corner of the padded mattress.

Last night, rehearsals had taken longer than I'd thought and in the end I was unable to speak to Namjoon again. Bed was more inviting anyway, considering I'd woken up before sunrise yesterday.

Today is an important day. Getting up and dressed and prepared is what I should go ahead and get a jump on, but the idea of another hour's sleep draws me in, while at the same time, Granny in the adjacent restroom slams the toilet lid shut.

No. It's not happening. I will go back to sleep. That is my Nindō, my ninja way.

"Guess we should get up." Eun-ji mumbles into the pillow, but then does just the opposite and curls more comfortably under the blankets.

Birds. I've decided I hate them. Because not ten seconds later does an unidentifiable number of them begin to chirp and sing right outside our window. Then granny—I could never hate her, just her presence at this moment—shuffles out of the washroom and rips the curtains wide open.

Now I hate the sun. Is it really crucial to our survival like all those scientists say it is? Or was it intentionally put there by someone out to get me, specifically?

I whip around on the bed to glare, but the sun immediately attacks my eyes. See! It did that on purpose!

Still not dramatic.

"Y/n sweetie, you're awake." My grandmother that I definitely do not hate or hold any type of resentment for in any way whatsoever, smiles in greeting. "Would you mind getting your granny some coffee? You know how my hip is."

Now I hate hips!!

Stupid old hip that wants to act up first thing in the morning and when it's cold or rains. I HATE THEM.

Not only that, but old age! Why can't we be like those ancient bitches in Tuck Everlasting that wanted to fish and eat pancakes all day? Why do we have to grow old and have our bodies deteriorate out from under us?

The natural process of aging can go fuck itself!

...I might be a little dramatic when I don't get enough sleep...and during my time of the month.

But that's the only times!

I grunt in acknowledgment and roll out of bed, barely managing to catch myself before I fall flat on my face. It's almost summer time. WHY is the floor freezing cold?

Because it hates me, obviously.

After slipping on a pair of socks and a sweater, I stumble my way down stairs and am immediately confused. People everywhere. Moving tables, carrying instruments, clearing out space and strategically placing brightly colored flowers all over the place. How are these people doing this? What kind of monster can move that efficiently this early in the morning on a Saturday?!?