Star Crossed Liars ✔

Chapter Ten

It was a mess. 

The day after the training lesson I had another lesson and gone to bed without too much hassle. 

My legs were jelly.

I had no feeling in my arms.

The only relief I could find was on my bed, curled up in a ball as tightly as possible. That was the only way I could get my abs to stop hurting.

The others had to help me get down to the eating hall, every step sends pulsating pain through my muscles. I had collapsed on the table, barely even being able to lift my mug to my lips.

Orion had looked, bad, almost guilty when he had seen me.

I didn't say anything to him, the area around my nose still slightly red. 

Everything had been getting more and more intense. My classes were getting harder, I was more stressed. I knew that coming in as a Decided aiming to be a doctor would be difficult, that no matter how high my grades were or how much I had learned, I could in no way even be close to being properly prepared.

Ivy, Valeria and Magnolia had been happy. I had watched them change, Magnolia especially. She had become much more open, and certainly more willing to talk. Valeria had become almost kinder, less harsh. Gabriel, Julian and Colton. I had gotten to know them slightly better, much to the girls delight that I had chosen to come and sit with them in the lounge room while they came to visit instead of holing myself up in my room.

Julian was a jokester, that was probably the first thing that I realised. He made fun of a lot of things but had a sense of respect.

Colton was immature, and I don't think I had seen him without some form of food either in his mouth or in his hand. 

Gabriel was quiet, very responsible, which made him a great match for Magnolia. He was a man of few words, at least from what I could tell.

I wasn't entirely sure why I felt more obligated to spend time with them, to get to know them better. I could only assume that it had something to do with the bond or maybe the fact that I'll be spending the rest of my life surrounded by them.

I was back to ignoring Orion. I couldn't keep relapsing into his devilish charming figure. It was bad, I knew that the moment we got to close, him being able to persuade me to change courses would be all too easy. Or at least being able to make it public, which was a huge no-no. After hearing Alpha Graves, I was on edge. He seemed like a nice guy, I mean, he was the Alpha of the pack of Peace, of course, he was going to be nice. But I also knew that if he found out that I was Orion's mate, everything would be over, whether Orion persuaded him otherwise or not.

Sometimes I confused myself. Why was I even doing this? Why couldn't I tell everyone, why was I refusing to change courses? It felt like my whole mind was a mess. Everything I said and did contradict something else that I had said, it was a continuous loop that I couldn't escape.

But every time my mind went into a spiral like that, I always forced myself to remember. To become a Doctor, to move to Sanitatem, to live out my dreams. Going public would force me to change to intended, either by Alpha Graves, the people around me, or even my parents.

But was that even my options? Was it even my life? Somewhere deep inside me, I knew that after this was all over, I wouldn't be going to Sanitatem, I wouldn't be becoming a doctor. I would be the Luna of the Vindex Pack.

Even I wasn't as stupid to disrespect the Moon Goddess's decisions like that.

She had made Orion and I mates for whatever reason. Going against that and pursuing my own ideals was practically asking for death. I think that in my heart, I knew I wasn't going to reject him, I was just prolonging my inevitable fate, avoiding it to be able to still feel some sort of control.