Chapter Twenty-Two

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STACY

Within a minute, Nick cracked the door open to his house as quietly as he could. He caught me off guard as he swung his arms around me and embraced all of me. I wrapped my arms around him and squeezed back, happy to feel wanted and needed.

"Thank you," he mumbled into my raincoat.

"Of course. Anything." He squeezed me tighter.

NICK

I guided Stacy to my room then shut the door. She sat on the bed and I followed. She looked so pretty tonight. She looked pretty earlier at dinner but she was gorgeous in the dim light of my bedroom now. She slipped her raincoat off and I put it on my desk chair.

We looked at one another and I knew she was waiting for me to explain. I looked away as a flood of feeling ashamed and childish washed over me.

"I had a bad dream." I admitted. I played with my hands in my lap and glanced over at Stacy's. She had her small hands tucked in between her curvy thighs. She's gotten so skinny lately. I wonder if she's taking care of herself. Her stomach no longer sticks out. She's gone down at least four bra sizes. She wears belts now and tighter shirts. She's been looking so much more confident these days. I'm so proud of her for how far she's come. Have I changed? Have I come as far as she has?

"I'm really proud of you, Nick," I looked up at her.

"For what?" I asked curiously.

"For feeling comfortable enough to tell me." I sighed with a pathetic smile on my anxious face.

"You look really pretty, Stacy." She smiled shyly then confidently nudged my shoulder with her face. I wrapped my arm around her then kissed her head. "I had another dream about you." I rubbed her arm but she didn't say anything. Thankfully. "You were getting married." She sat up and looked at me with questioning eyes and my grip on her loosened. "But I wasn't the groom." I looked away and took my arm off of her. "You looked so happy standing in a white dress with flowers in your hand. Your parents were happy, too, along with your brothers. I felt so jealous. The man surrounded by your family—I was so jealous of him. He didn't have a face. But you both looked so ... happy ... . I ... I want you to promise me to never be happy without me but that's so controlling and clingy that I can't help but tell you now that you need to always be happy. You need to be happy Stacy. You are beautiful when you smile. When I first began noticing you, while I was texting you if you can believe it, I always watched for your smile. You would be at school looking so sad and closed off but at the park you were always smiling to the homeless people. Even on a cold, gloomy, winter day, you made me happy. So ... if we aren't together, promise me you'll always be happy. And confident. And kind. Always be kind. Whichever man God chooses for you to live forever with, he better make you smile." I looked down at my hands. "I might not be the right match for you, I'm sorry."

"Are you breaking up with me?" She barely said in a whisper. I looked over and watched as my girlfriend wiped a stray tear off her round cheek. "You've gotten tired of me, haven't you? Oh my gosh, I should have seen this coming. Why didn't I see this coming?" Her single tear was turning into many. "Oh Nick. Please. You want me to be happy but you're making me so sad."

"Stacy, I'm not improving! And I'm just dragging you down with me!"

"You are changing, Nick! You are, Nick! You're changing and you're changing for yourself, not for me! And it's my choice if I want to be by your side always. And you're not dragging me down."

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