Hymen [Yoonmin]

52.

Jimin turned around paranoid. Had he heard right? Or was his mind simply playing a trick on him?

In fact it was Yoongi.

Jimin nodded trying to swallow all of the candy he had just put in his mouth. He would've loved to say no, but he couldn't.

"May I?" He asked extending his hand.

He nervously looked down at his pale hand. If he could've screamed he would've right then and there.

Jimin remained frozen for a slight second. He agreed moving head slowly. Yoongi took it without thinking about it twice. Then proceeded to the nearest exit.

It was dark outside, but the parking lot lights illuminated it all. It was a bit cold outside and neither of them felt it at all. Their bodies were both flushed and jittery at being so close to each other. 

Holding hands was making their whole world spin around. They even started getting a bit sweaty. Yoongi kept walking until they reached his vehicle which was parked closer to the hotel.

Jimin timorously stood in front of him waiting for him to speak. Yoongi kept looking down at the ground thinking of his word choice very carefully.

He didn't want to hurt Jimin again. So he had to think this through. He wasn't very good with words or expressing himself. It just wasn't him. But for Jimin he would try.

All he had been feeling for weeks now was confusion. He thought he wanted to be with Dahyun. He fought to be in a relationship with her. And it felt like it was all falling apart.

"I'm sorry. I know an apology is not enough." He started.

Jimin kept quiet. He would've loved to accept it and move on, but he couldn't. He needed answers.

He felt anger and pain mixed together which equaled heartache. If he was so willing to try with Dahyun and risk losing their friendship why was it so different with them?

Why couldn't he give them a chance too?

"I have no right to even be here talking to you about this like I own you. I don't even know what to say. I'm so conflicted Jimin. But do you want to know the truth?" He asked looking up.

"Yes." He whispered softly.

"I miss you. I miss us."

"I do too. But you're still with her." He whispered.

Yoongi laughed, "I'm a horrible person. I thought I wanted to be with her and all I've brought upon her is misery. I wanted to make you happy and all I've done is made you sad. I'm not good with feelings. I don't know how to say what I'm feeling, okay? All I know is that I keep making mistakes. I keep fucking up and I try really hard to keep everyone around me smiling. It turns out I do a terrible job at it. I have trust issues, overthink everything, and am always scared to try and fail."

Jimin held the candy tightly. His stomach started rumbling making him completely sick. He quickly ran to the grass vomiting everything he had eaten.

Yoongi followed behind patting his back softly. Jimin was extremely embarrassed and kept trying to push him away. He didn't want him to see or smell this.

"It's okay. I want to be here." Yoongi told not moving back.

When he was done emptying his stomach he stepped back horrified. "Oh gosh. No, no. Why do I always puke everywhere?"

Yoongi gave him a half smile, "Think about it this way it's like a natural fertilizer for the grass."

"Yeah. Y-yeah. You're right. It's fertilizing the grass isn't it?"