Before I Go

Chapter 11- Parker Adams

"Hey, Morgan," a voice from behind me says. It's kind of deep and definitely masculine and offers kindness while simultaneously sending an unexpected shiver down my spine. My heart races, automatically kicking into overdrive as my brain tells me that not only do I recognize the voice, but I absolutely cannot believe that he's actually talking to me. It's utterly absurd how a simple greeting can affect me in such a way, and I mentally scold myself for reacting at all. If I don't get a grip on my feelings now, I'll likely embarrass myself in front of the entire school.

And that's the last thing I want.

Slowly, I turn around to acknowledge the person, only to be met by the breathtaking smiling face of none other than Parker Adams. That handsome face that I daydream about and his perfect, heart-melting smile. It's just as beautiful now as it was back in our crayon-sharing days, only it's not toothless anymore. A strange sensation rolls in my stomach, something I could only describe as a cross between butterflies and a wild elephant stampede, and that probably isn't even a remotely accurate explanation of the new feeling. Whatever it is, it's both highly uncomfortable and mildly exciting at the same time.

"H-hey, Parker," I say, feeling slightly proud of myself for only stuttering a little bit. However, I instantly feel my anxiety clawing at my throat at the sheer thought of the situation I've suddenly found myself in. I force myself to swallow it down, reminding myself that this is just a simple, normal interaction between a girl and a boy. A ridiculously good-looking boy. My heart stutters in my chest as I continue to take in the moment, and despite the slight anxiousness, I don't think I hate this.

So far, today feels like a good day.

"You have math next, right?" Parker asks, motioning to the thick math book in my hands. I nod in response, biting my lip, unable to form another sentence as his sparkling eyes captivate me completely. "Can I walk you to class?" he asks, a sudden nervousness hinting at his expression.

Parker wants to walk me to class...? Am I dreaming?

Crap, I just noticed that I haven't given him an answer yet.

"Uh... yeah, that would be okay," I reply, internally cringing at how stupid I sound. I just can't possibly seem, I don't know, cool?--at a time like this? Yet, at the same time, I'm overwhelmed with happiness at this surprising turn of events. I can't even believe what's happening right now.

Parker smiles at me, a warm, genuine-looking smile. One that threatens to instantly turn me into a puddle of Morgan mush on the floor. "Great," he says, his eyes twinkling with an emotion I'm not sure I'm familiar with, but I don't question it. Instead, I soak it in, ruminating in the positive feelings he's giving off. "Shall we?"

I nod again, unsure if any words would even come out of my mouth at this point and wholly unwilling to find out; I'd likely just stutter and mumble something only halfway intelligent, making myself look like an even bigger loser than I already seem. Maybe I've forgotten how to speak entirely. Even if I could force out an audible sound, it likely wouldn't be coherent at all in my current state. Am I broken? Has my brain short-circuited? Is this the end of the line for Morgan Feldman? Well, if it is, there are certainly far worse endings than this.

Parker Adams is walking me to class.

"So, there's this party this weekend," Parker says after several moments of silently walking side by side, his arm brushing lightly against mine as we maneuver through the crowded hallway. The skin-on-skin contact only lasts a second or two, but it still sends a pleasant wave of warmth through my body. "It would be cool if you'd come."

I'm momentarily rendered speechless as the reality sinks in that Parker Adams just invited me to a party. Parker Adams is choosing to invite me, of all people. How is this even possible? Somehow, I manage to collect myself enough to squeak out, "Oh, um... parties... aren't really my thing..." I feel my face flush at how extremely awkward I suddenly am, knowing exactly how embarrassing my voice sounded just now. The smile falls from Parker's face, and I'm pretty sure my heart drops right along with it. What the fudge am I doing?! What's wrong with me? Entirely without my consent, my mouth unexpectedly blurts out, "But for you, I'll think about it." The newfound confidence surges through me quickly before dramatically fizzling out, leaving me once again overthinking things. At times like this, I really hate my own mind.

Holy crap, Morgan! What was that?! It sounded kinda flirty... Did you mean to be flirty?

Oh, shoot... what if Parker wasn't flirting? What if he was just trying to be friendly?

"Thanks, Morgan. I'd really like it if you were there," he says, smiling sweetly at me. His eyes connect with mine unwaveringly, the sincerity in his gaze filling my belly with butterflies. I struggle to maintain eye contact, my body shifting its weight from foot to foot as I gaze quietly at the boy before me. Relief hits me like a train when Parker completely ignores my awkwardness, and I can't stop myself from returning the smile.

"Well, I'll see you later, Morgan," he says, still smiling at me.

"Thanks for walking me to class, Parker," I say shyly, quietly, although there's a party going on internally that I can't seem to silence. I don't have any idea what is going on today, but I've decided I have absolutely no room to complain.

"Maybe we could make it a more regular occurrence," he replies with a wink as he turns to head towards his own class.

I'm left staring after Parker as he disappears into a classroom down the hall, a smile stuck to my lips and an embarrassing giggle working its way up my throat.

Yep. Today is definitely a good day.