Always In My Heart

Chapter 3- Him.

I wake up to the horrific sound of my alarm beeping loudly on the nightstand next to my bed. I let out a loud, exhausted groan into the pillow before reaching out and attempting to smack the snooze button. I finally manage to turn off the obnoxious thing and crush my face back into the pillow. I sigh loudly thinking of the long day ahead of me.

I have my classes at University until 3 o'clock today and then have to go to work at the grocery shop immediately after. I guarantee I will not be home until at least 9 o'clock.

I manage to drag myself out of bed to get ready. As I stand in the bathroom mirror brushing my teeth, I assess my dreams from last night. . .

I walk down the narrow hallway leading to the kitchen, wanting a late-night snack. I walk into the kitchen to find not only Nikki, but a strange man, too. Why does he look so familiar?

He's very tall with dark hair and dark piercing eyes. He stands towering over her, giving her a seductive look. She returns the same expression right back to him, biting her lip. I gape at them in horror, clearing my throat loudly to hopefully get their attention. But neither of them acknowledge me even the slightest bit. They just continue that locked gaze with each other. I walk over and swallow hard, watching them closely. I don't know why, but I absolutely hate seeing her look at another guy this way.

"Nikki," I choke out, almost in tears, looking down at the floor.

"Oh, how much I love you," she says quietly. My lips quickly twitch up into a smile and I look up at her happily, but she's not looking at me. She's looking at him. That horrible man from the art store! Tears begin to fall from my eyes and sting my cheeks.

"I love you, too," he says, his voice soft and seductive. My mouth falls open and I begin to sob hysterically. She's slipping right through my fingers. I CANNOT lose her to him.

"NIKKI!" I scream out in a sob, my body shaking uncontrollably, but she just ignores me. The man is not phased by me, either.

"NIKKI, AM I JUST INVISIBLE TO YOU NOW?!?!" I scream, my voice cracking and shaking. Neither of them look at me.

I look over at the mirror hanging on the wall. I see them, standing there in that locked, seductive gaze, but I am not there. My heart stops. I am invisible. Not only to her, not only to him, not only to everyone, but to me. I am truly invisible. I gape in agony at the mirror and try to be strong.

"No... no...NOOOO!!!!!" I scream so loudly, sobbing hysterically as the man pulls my Nikki into a slow, passionate kiss. . .

I stand in the bathroom mirror with the toothbrush motionless in my mouth, the water running wastefully from the tap and down the drain. I blink over and over, staring at myself, before running a shaky hand down my reflection. My breathing has quickened and my forehead glistens with a light sheen of sweat.

You are not invisible. You are not invisible. You are right here. You always will be. You won't lose her, Lou. You won't. My conscience tries hard to calm me down.

I finish brushing my teeth and run my hands through my hair that is still damp from the shower. I tousle my fringe around and sigh looking in the mirror. I am just not in the mood to even try today.

I walk out of the bathroom and into my bedroom, looking out the window. And of course, the weather always seems to match my mood. The sunshine and my good mood yesterday must have been a stroke of luck. Because today, my usual, depressing mood matches the usual, gloomy, London sky. And that's really all I'm ever comfortable with anymore, is just the usual. Maybe I am afraid of change.