Black [Ron Weasley]

( I woke up )

Chapter 30

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ɴᴇᴠᴀᴇʜ'ꜱ ᴘᴏᴠ

The winter days were getting darker and colder.

Maybe Malfoy had reconsidered his assassination because the next few weeks were quiet. He didn't enter the room of requirements once and that made me suspicious. I felt like I wasn't paying enough attention, maybe it was the lack of sleep. The revelation of Malfoy's deepest secret kept me up at night apart from the other things that had already been keeping me from getting a good night sleep.

Classes weren't as interesting as before. I couldn't pay attention like I used to. I fell behind on studying. Even the ghosts were starting to worry. They used to be one of the few 'persons' I talked to and now I didn't even do that. I felt detached from reality, I wasn't as alert as I used to, not as focused.

Everyone in the castle was hyped up for the upcoming quidditch match between Gryffindor and Slytherin. I promised myself to try and make the best of the weekend, maybe I'd even enjoy the quidditch match. I pushed Malfoy off my mind for a while and gave my mind some peace.

Wearing a big winter jacket, gloves and a scarf I found a good spot to watch the quidditch game. I was surrounded by all the cheerful Gryffindor students, some awfully surprised to see my face.
Didn't surprise me, most of the times I was waiting for Draco to show up in one of the empty corridors, so I barely interacted with any Gryffindors anymore.

"Nev, I'm surprised to see you here." Hermione said, her fluffy curls almost completely hidden underneath a warm hat. Her cheeks were red of the cold air touching her skin. Hermione seemed so different than last year.

"Decided it was the perfect opportunity to get some fresh air." I answered, using my not so real smile. Sometimes people actually bought it but I knew people who knew me better could see past it.

"I'm glad you're here." she said and pushed her hands into her pockets. We sat next to each other in silence for the biggest part of the game. Every now and then we'd share a look when Gryffindor scored.

Seeing Ron and Harry play was fun, it made me forget about everything that kept me up at night. Ron had gotten much better, he knew exactly what to do and served his team right.

I missed playing, feeling weightless on my broomstick. I used to play all the time but it all changed when my mom died. I remembered how much fun Viktor and I used to have. We used to play for such a long time that when we got home it was already so late that it had gotten completely dark outside. Mom didn't like it much but that didn't stop us from doing it again.

All the Gryffindors jumped up in excitement when Gryffindor won. Everyone applauded and cheered for the team, they had played really good. Ron looked happy, very happy. I was happy for him, he deserved to be happy. I left quickly after the game, didn't want Ron to catch a sight of me, didn't want to ruin his good mood.

Apparently they had planned a post-game party in the Gryffindor common room because when I opened my journal to write some thoughts I could suddenly hear a lot of commotion coming from downstairs. I decided to take a look for myself, not caring if anyone saw me dressed in black sweats and a plain black top.

Fred and George were the centre of attention as always but this time they weren't the only ones. Ron was being congratulated by everyone, a lot of people wanted to have a chat about the game with him, all proud of the Gryffindor quidditch players.

I watched from the corner of the room. Not standing by his side was harder than ever. It gave me some peace knowing he was smiling wider than ever. His hair was messy from playing quidditch but it looked amazing on him. His brown eyes were bright, filled with joy.

I missed him more than ever. I wanted to be near him so much, I needed to. I couldn't be selfish but it took everything inside me to not run up to him and jump into his arms and forget about everything. I wanted him to hold me, to squeeze me tightly and tell me everything was going to be ok because he was the best at calming me down.

Maybe I didn't have to do everything alone. Maybe we could fight the monsters together. In the end that's what love is all about, fight for each other, protect each other at all costs and most importantly to never give up on them. Like my father, how he didn't give up when my mother didn't want to go on a date with him. He didn't leave it at that, he fought for her and in the end she could see how special he was.

I took the deepest breath ever and walked forwards. My eyes caught his, he shook me awake inside.

But it was too late.