Queen of Disaster | 𝑅𝑒𝑚𝑢𝑠 𝐿𝑢𝑝𝑖𝑛

Chapter 75

"If Filch catches us and gets us into trouble because of you, I'll kill you as soon as you sober up," Diana said jokingly as they finally reached the entrance to the Gryffindor common room.

"Password?" asked the Fat Lady, looking down at the two of them curiously from inside her portrait.

"Oh, how ravishing you look tonight, my Fair Lady! I've never noticed how beautiful you looked before!" Remus said dramatically, smiling brightly at the woman in the portrait.

"Oh... thank you, Remus." The Fat Lady chuckled lightly, looking flattered as she blushed.

"It's the truth. You know, I think it's very mean of people to call you Fat Lady. You're very lovely. I mean, what's wrong with being curvy? It's very very very pretty. Wow... I might actually be falling in love with you," said Remus, looking up at the Fat Lady admirably while leaning on Diana who was trying her best not to fall while holding him up as well.

"Is your friend okay?" The Fat Lady asked Diana quietly while watching Remus worriedly.

"He's never been better," Diana said sarcastically, glaring sideways at Remus as she tried to hold him from falling. "Can't you just let us in? You've known him for six years."

"I'm afraid not. I need the password," said the Fat Lady, staring at Remus in horror as he made kissy faces at her before breaking down into giggles.

"Remus, for crying out loud! What's the freaking password!?" Diana cried out in frustration, her arms growing tired from supporting him.

"Hmm... I think it was something in the lines of Jimmy... or maybe Jamesyweed... or... Weedjims... Jimonweed... Weed — Have you ever noticed that if you repeat a word a few times it will lose all its meaning?" Remus laughed. "Here. Try it with me. Weed. Weed. Weed. Weed. Weed. Weed. Weed. Weed. Weed. Weed. Weed. Wee — Ha! I sound like a frog who had a baby with a chicken! Weed! Weed! Weed! W—"

"Oh, for Godric's sake! The password Jimsonweed! Just get inside and stop talking!" The Fat Lady huffed out as she held her ears, opening the portrait for them.

"Oh, thank God." Diana sighed in relief, dragging a giggling Remus inside. "I really hope you remember all of this tomorrow so I can make fun of you while you're in remorse and suffering from a bad headache."

Diana had never thought she would step into the Gryffindor common room ever again, but as she looked around, she couldn't deny that she liked being in here. It certainly was the coziest place she'd ever seen. It was a circular room full of squashy scarlet armchairs, tables, and a fireplace nearby that warmed up the whole place.

      "Oi! You two! Stop kissing! Kissing is illegal after twelve o'clock!" Remus suddenly yelled at two second year Gryffindors who were sitting on the couch in front of the fireplace, doing their homework late at night.

      "But we weren't —" the boy tried to say, but Remus cut him off.

     "I said no kissing! That would be fifty points from Gryffind— hmph!" Diana was quick to hold a hand over Remus's hand, silencing him and muffling out his words as the two second years grabbed their books and ran upstairs to their dorms.

     "The Slytherins will kick me out of their House if they find out I stopped you from taking fifty points off Gryffindor," Diana grumbled, removing her hand from Remus's mouth.