Y/N and the Avengers

Lost Life

It took you a while to get used to everything and you had put a few things in your room so it didn't just look like EQ8's.
Natasha kept her distance from you, Clint on the other hand wasn't that distanced anymore.
You sat in the kitchen when Tony walked in: "So, two face, how are you adjusting?" You pressed your lips together to not jump at him for that nickname he just gave you and said: "It's difficult. I just can't feel at home in that room. It reminds me of EQ8 all the time." "Hm. Well, two doors down the hallway is a free room. Take that for yourself, I just have to secure it first." "So you want me to be locked in again?" He turned around and looked at you confused until he realized the problem: "No, no no. I just don't want us to suffer with you, your ability is a bit out of control sometimes. No locky lock, just power off." You rolled your eyes. °He sucks.° 'Absolutely.'

It took him a few days to get the room ready and you felt a bit overwhelmed when it was.
You had put the few things you had into the new room, but the best part was that one pastel pink wall you had Tony asked for. "Just one?", he had asked. "I just want it to be aesthetically pleasing, not a princess room", you had answered.

It was already dark but you didn't feel like sleeping so you walked over to Natasha's room. You still needed answers and you thought that now would be the best time for that.
When you knocked she was suddenly behind you and asked what you wanted. You turned around and told her that you wanted to talk. She studied your face and body language until she sighed and you both walked in.
"Y/n, I know you have a lot of questions but please", she sighed again, "make it quick. I need some sleep." "I know you just feel uncomfortable, it's okay I get it, but don't lie to me about sleep. Anyway, I don't get why you can be friends with her but ignore me. It's okay that you do, don't get me wrong, I just don't understand." "At first it hurt a lot, seeing you, but also not at all. She was overwhelmed and I felt bad seeing her like that. Seeing you like that. I know it wasn't you, but you get what I mean?" You nodded, so she continued: "So I helped her a little and got used to the fact that she's using your body - God, that sounds weird - but I also got to know her better and began to see a completely different person. So when you were back, all the pain was back as well. I know it sounds unfair, but you two are pretty different so it's easy to spot who's there and the involved feelings change with it." You nodded understanding and tears were about to betray you but you did your best to suppress them.
"But I promise you to keep an eye on Q, so don't be scared that she'd ruin your life", Natasha added. "Yeah... Q... whatever... however, thank you. I won't bother you any longer. Have a good night and sweet dreams", you said and stood up, walking back to your room fast. She had said something when you had left, but you didn't hear it.
'Why does it have to be my life? Why mine? It's already broken and in pieces, why do you need to make it worse, huh?!' But EQ8 didn't answer, you weren't even sure if she was there.
You walked to the bathroom, splashed some water on your face and looked in the mirror. Angrily you punched it and your knuckles began to pulsate, turned red and a bit of blood came out.
The mirror was broken, a few pieces lay in the sink and on the floor, and a few were still on the wall, just cracked or missing some. You tried to take a deep breath but it was shaky from anger.

You headed to the other room, walked in and grabbed one of the knives. Wanting to destroy the whole room you let it be and instead made your way back again. You put in the first number when Bucky's voice appeared next to you: "What are you doing there?" You stopped and took a deep breath while closing your eyes for a second.
"Stay away Barnes", you said through gritted teeth and pressed the other numbers.
The door clicked and you were about to push it open when Bucky grabbed your arm and turned you around.
"Stay away and leave me alone. Now!", you said, still full of anger that even a person far away could feel. "No, I won't", he said firmly.
Trying to get his grip off of you, he tried to get the knife you were holding. "Please just give it to me and let's talk", he said and you two stopped, just staring at each other. "No. Just leave me alone, this doesn't have to end in a fight." "It always ends up in a fight", Bucky replied and continued to get the knife. You sighed and while Bucky had your arm in a tight grip, you let the knife drop and caught it with your other hand.
"I don't want to hurt you, just-" "You won't", he interrupted and the both of you got into an eager fight until he had you pinned down. "Get off and leave me alone or I'll hit you with it", you threatened, the tip of the knife pressing onto him. "You wouldn't do that", he said smirking. "Bet", you said, reached out and hit him in the back. His eyes widened. "You really did it? You're dead", he said in shock, thinking you just stabbed him which you didn't. You had used the side of the grip to hit him, not the blade. But he was distracted, trying to look out for blood, which you used to get him off of you.
"There is no wound", he noticed and you grinned, "I knew you wouldn't do it!" "I just said I'd hit you. Not I'm going to stab you to death." "I just- I- you little-", he said, interrupting himself a few times and began to tickle you as revenge.
You ran into your room, but couldn't close the door fast enough so Bucky came in as well, running behind you to catch and tickle you. "Stop it! No! Don't do it!", you yelled at him but with a smile on your face and tried to keep distance between the both of you. He came closer so you ran over the bed to get to the other side, not wanting to run into him.
You two laughed while playing this little cat and mouse game until you exclaimed a timeout.
Bucky blocked the way out and you let yourself fall onto your bed, panting. He came closer and took the knife which you weren't protecting as much anymore. Actually it was just laying in your open hand and you didn't even move your fingers when he took it.
"So all it takes is a tickle fight? I guess you enjoy a normal one way too much", he said and giggled. "Maybe. But don't tickle me again or you are a dead man, Barnes!" He laughed and secured the knife on the back of his belt.
He walked to the bathroom, the door of it right next to your bed, and saw the mess of glass and reflection. Turning around he asked with a worried look on his face: "What... what happened here? Are you alright?" His eyes wandered to your hands which he couldn't see the back of because you had placed them above your head, the outside facing the bed. "Show me your hands", he demanded but you simply closed your eyes so he'd know you were ignoring him.
But when you felt the bed moving you opened them and saw the man above you, reaching out for your hands. When he noticed it he blushed but kept going, grabbing your hand and pulling it with him.
You sat up, freed your hand and hid them between your legs. It stung a little but you didn't want him to see it.
"Please just leave", you whispered and looked into his eyes which were in front of you because he was kneeling down. "No. I'll help you, okay? Just show me your hands, I want to take care of them", he said softly. You looked down and showed Bucky your hands.
"Damn... we need to get that out. How were you able to fight with that?" He was turning your hand around and around to have a better look at the long fragment of glass in your skin. He also examined your other hand and sighed.
"We need to get them out. I think we should go to Banner for that." "It's not that bad..." "We need to get that out", Bucky said firmly. "Sure, I get that, but please... can't you do it...? I don't want the others to be involved in any way... it's bad enough you are involved..." He shook his head huffing, got up and left.
You looked at the fragments in your skin and it felt surreal, you didn't feel them but you saw them. You got up and grabbed a tweezer.
When you were about to remove the glass, Bucky stopped you, holding a bag, and came over.
"It will just get infected if you do it like that. Let me do it, doll." Bucky grabbed the disinfectant and sprayed it on your hands. It burnt like hell but you didn't want to show it so you just pressed your teeth together.
He took another tweezer and sprayed it with disinfectant as well, saying "From now on it will get worse" as if it wasn't going downhill before already.
While he removed all the fragments, you did your best to sit still and try to get your focus on Bucky so you wouldn't feel the pain too much.
It was cute when he was concentrating on something and it was cute when he blew the hair strand away that kept coming into his face. He cleaned it once again before he looked at you and said: "I hate to say it, but this one needs stitches. It will hurt a lot." Bucky was worried, knowing the answer you'd give him.
"Continue", you said and gave him a reassuring smile. He sighed and grabbed everything he needed.
"Ready?", he asked having his hands with the tools above your left hand. You nodded. The pain was disgusting and pretty bad but nothing you couldn't handle.