I am home

Chapter 30:

Scarlett's POV

Another week has passed since I took the drug test. Maya and Carina started to relax a little and I had to be extremely careful around them, in order not to raise suspicions again.

I woke up at 6.30 AM again and got ready for school. I haven't been going to the train station or camp in the last two days and also haven't heard from Payton, so I decided to just go check on her.

As usual, I got ready and Carina dropped me off at school.

Carina: "Bye honey, have a nice day."

I said my goodbyes and headed in for Art class. Art class is always super chill.

We mostly get to do what we want and to be honest everyone thinks our teacher is on drugs. Last lesson she told us about how she froze her dead cat because she didn't want to upset her daughter who had to write a maths test that day.

(A/n: Actually a true story 😂)

Art always passes by super quickly and it's the only topic I would sit through 6 hours for.

After Arts, I decided to take a stroll through the park, because the weather was really nice. I couldn't stop thinking about what Ali had told me last night.

I just felt so sorry for her, but at the same time, we had to prepare for this moment eventually. I stopped to watch a couple play with their two kids on the playground.

They looked truly happy. I wanted that too. A happy family.

I dawdled to the nearest bus stop and drove to the train station.

When I arrived, I first looked for Payton. I checked everywhere, the toilets, the different tracks, and behind the train station.

Payton was nowhere to be found.

I decided to just wait at her usual spot and start doing some schoolwork.

Hours had passed and Payton still didn't show. At first, I thought she was just busy with a suitor, but then I decided to go check at the homeless camp.

I packed my things and was just about to leave when a familiar voice stopped me.

Max: "Oh hey Scarlett."

Me: "Hey, have you seen Payton?"

Max: "Didn't you hear", he asked me confused.

Me: "Hear what", I chuckled nervously.

Max: "Scarlett, Payton OD'd yesterday. She was brought to the hospital."

Max kept explaining, but all I could hear were muffled sounds.

This couldn't be true. No. She was well and okay. She was just...it just couldn't....

I tried to keep in the tears.

And I did what I always do.

I ran.

I ran as fast as my legs could take me, and my lungs felt like they were about to explode. I ran to the place I felt safest at. Maya and Carina's apartment.

I stormed in the front door and immediately fell to my knees. And that's when I let go. I cried so hard that I stopped breathing.

Maya: "Oh my god! Scarlett? Scarlett! Is everything okay", she asked in a panic.

I couldn't say a word. The tears just kept flowing and my eyes were so filled with them, that I couldn't see anymore.

Maya: "Carina! Carina I need you to come here right now", she yelled.

Carina: "Okay, okay I'm...Oh my god, what happened? Is everything okay?"

Both of the women knelt down in front of me and held my hands.

Me: "She...I...", I tried to say something.

I could feel that both of them were hugging me and trying to calm me down.

Carina kept whispering to me in Italian, that everything was going to be alright and that I need to calm down.

After a few "follow my breathing"'s and "It's okay, you're safe"'s, I was able to breathe.

I stopped crying for a solid two minutes.

Carina: "Hey what happened bambina, did someone hurt you?"

I shook my head.

Maya: "Was it something that happened at school?"

I shook my head again.

Me: "I'm so sorry. I lied to you. I didn't go to school and I'm not sober. I could've helped Payton but I chose not to say anything and now she is in the hospital and it's all my fault", the water-works turned on again.

Maya and Carina both had worried expressions on their faces.

Me: "I am so, so sorry", I sobbed.

Carina wrapped me in another hug, while Maya held my hand.

I hugged her back as tightly as possible and let go of every single drop of tears in my body.

I asked to be excused for a little while, to calm down and went to my room.

I washed off the tears on my face and sat down on my bed trying to calm myself down.

*Ok Scarlett, breathe in, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7. Hold 1, 2, 3, 4. And exhale 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10*, I thought to myself.

I did this process for about 45 minutes and tried to keep my mind as clear as possible.

The moment of shock was over. I had to face it now. Payton is still alive and that's all that matters.

I took another deep breath in and exhaled, before leaving my room.

Maya and Carina were sitting at the dining table, holding each other's hands and discussing something.

Maya: "Hey, are you alright bug", Maya asked.

Me: "Yeah, I think I'm okay now", I smiled.

Carina still looked really worried.

Me: "Look can we...talk?"

Maya: "Sure, whatever you want to talk about", she looked at Carina.

Carina just nodded and I took another deep breath in and out.

Me: "Well...I want to tell you my story."