TWENTY SIX

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• a loving family •

• a loving family •

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It's today. We're going to France. Everyone is ready, everything is in place. This is it. I look down at the tattoo on my right wrist and keep thinking... is it gonna be worth it?

The French mafia will be vulnerable after we take Gabriel. It will get damaged. Am I really going to betray it like that? The question is, will I choose myself over my home, my people? It's either I betray myself or my country, this should have been an easy choice for most humans as they are naturally selfish— not me, I'm barely human, I'm a machine programmed to protect my country and now I'm going to betray it. And I never really cared for myself, the only thing I've ever liked about me was my loyalty. Loyal? Not anymore.

So I'm going to betray myself and my country. What will that do to me? I'm scared. I'm terrified.

I look away from the tattoo and look into the mirror. I'm not ready. But will I ever be ready to do this? No, I won't. My eyes started watering but I blinked the tears away.

"Ça va aller. Tout ira bien." I reassured myself as I secured my braid. I went downstairs to eat breakfast and it's very early as I couldn't sleep last night from nerves. I didn't think I was gonna find anyone awake at this hour but I was shocked to find all of them. They were all shirtless, I swear to god they don't have shirts, it's insane. And apparently some of them don't have pants either as Gio and Kieran are in just boxers.

This is the first time I see Milo shirtless though, his whole upper body was tattooed, so so many tattoos that they all look like one big tattoo. But not only his upper body, his lower body too. I think his whole body is tattooed. That's so cool but now he looks even more intimidating. Though when he noticed me, his eyes softened and smiled.

"Go fuck yourself—" Kieran said pushing Elio against the wall who just laughed.

"Boys! Morana is here, let's talk appropriately." Milo said and that's when they all noticed me. "What would you like to eat?" He asked me.

"Pancakes." I said looking at the plate Gio is holding. He also has a lot of tattoos but only on his arms and a big one on his back. He gave me his plate immediately. "What about you?" I asked him.

"I'm not hungry." He responded stealing bacon from Milo's plate. They are all eating while standing up except for Adriano, so I took a seat next to him with my pancakes.

I looked around, at my brothers. I thought the choice was between me and my country. No, it's not. I don't care about myself. The choice is actually between my brothers and my country. I would choose my brothers over and over again. I feel protective of them. I care about them. Just like I care about my country— But not more than my brothers, my now family, my now home.

"You're nervous?" Adriano asked me causing all the conversations to stop and all of them to focus on me.

"No, not nervous." I said continuing to scroll down on my phone, not wanting to look at them. I don't want them to see the doubts and the hesitation.

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