7 days

March 2024

POV: Ishaan Kishan.

Dear my love,

Remember the first day we met? Your laugh caught my attention before I saw you, the same laugh which later became my favorite sound to hear. I don't remember much from the shoot, other than how you made me feel.

You loved me like no one else ever did. You were patient when I was nothing but stubborn. You always somehow found it in your heart to forgive me, and I couldn't have been more grateful for that. You loved me in my lows and supported me through my highs. You made me laugh on days I didn't think I could, you held me close when I was scared, you kissed all my injuries and made sure that I was always full and content. You loved me in ways that I see only in movies. You are my ‘Ram’ from Sita Ramam.

Ishu, I know that I have hurt you both knowingly and unknowingly, and for that I am so sorry. I thought I was saving you from getting hurt, but I was just hurting you more instead. I should have trusted you. I'm sorry that I didn't. I loved you in every way I could, maybe it was flawed, but it wasn't a lie, I did love you, each and every second, with each and every beat of my heart, I loved you.

‘ Meri mohabbat jhooti nehi thi, muhje galat samajh kar muhjse khabhi nafrat mat karna’

I pray that, maybe in another life, I would be brave enough to kiss you in public, to boldly confess my love and not worry about my career. I pray that in another life, we can be married.  I pray that you always stay happy, healthy and safe.

I hope you can forgive me for all the mistakes that I made.

I love you, and I will continue to love you.

Yours forever,
Jaan-e-jahan.

Ishaan kissed the letter before he put it back in the envelope. He wiped the tears away and laid on his side, curled up in a ball, pressing the envelope to his chest.

‘ Jaani?’ Shreyas sat down beside him.

‘ Finally read it?’

Ishaan nodded.

Shreyas gently stroked his head and let him cry as much as he wanted to.

‘ Is there anything I can do?’ he asked softly.

Ishaan sat up wiping his tears away. He held out his arms for a hug. Shreyas smiled and hugged him tightly.

‘ Do you want ice cream?’

‘ No…’

‘ What can I do to make you feel better?’

Ishaan hugged him tighter.

‘ Promise me you won't leave me’

‘ I promise.’

Ishaan pulled back and kissed his cheeks.

‘ I miss pancake’ Ishaan said after a while.

‘ I wasn't going to bring him on our honeymoon. We do rated R stuff.’

Ishaan laughed and pushed him away. Shreyas watched as he blushed a deep crimson and playfully proceeded to get closer to him.

‘ No Shrey!’

‘ Oye Jaani, yeh na kar…’

Shreyas disheartened, tried to move away but Ishaan held his hand.

‘ We can, if you want’

‘ Do you want to?’

‘ Obviously’

Shreyas smirked and started unbuttoning his shirt.

Ishaan tossed and turned, he was unable to sleep. He looked over at Shreyas, who was lying on his stomach, fast asleep. Ishaan tried everything. He took a cold shower, smoked a cigarette, he woke Shreyas up after the first round and did it again, but he was still unable to fall asleep.

‘ Where are you going?’ Shreyas mumbled.

‘ I can't sleep, I'm going to make some hot chocolate’

‘ Should I come?’

‘ No..I will come soon’

Ishaan scrolled on his phone as he waited for the milk to boil. He commented on a picture of Aditi and Dhruv’s date night. Aditi looked happy as she hugged Dhruv. He has been good to Aditi, so much so that her parents were thinking of a spring wedding. Ishaan scrolled some more and stopped on a post. It was a collaboration post between Hello magazine with Shubman Gill. Ishaan presses play on the video.

It was a short snippet of the interview, his likes and dislikes, his idol, his favorite, cricket shot, things like that. The last few seconds made Ishaan's heart ache.

‘ Do you have a girlfriend?’

‘ No..’ Shubman smiled sadly.

‘ Mohabbat huyi?’

‘ Ji bilkul huyi’

‘ Kitni baar?’

‘ Ek baar’

‘ Mili’

‘ Nahi..milna..milna Kiya hota hai’